#1 | Billy Hargrove

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"Y/n, let me out of here!" Billy screams, trying his hardest to get the door open. He lowers his voice, almost to a whisper, before speaking again. "Let me out."

Standing back between Eleven and Max, I couldn't help but wonder if this was a bad idea.

  Since the beginning of summer, I started to suspect something was wrong with Billy a little while after he took his job as a lifeguard at the Hawkins community pool. No one believed me, especially Max.

"You think this is funny? You kids think this is some kind of sick prank, huh?" Billy snapped.

  He, then, angrily spits on the small, square glass that's attached onto the door where we could all see him inside.

  "You little sh*ts think this is funny?" He yelled.

I closed my eyes, trying to calm myself down. Billy mumbles something that no one can really hear, due to him being on the other side of the door from us. After taking in a few deep breaths, I finally open my eyes.

  "Open the door," he quietly says, "open the door!" Billy repeats, this time in a much louder tone. Everyone jumps from their places.

  "Open the door! Open the god d*mn door!" He kept repeating, making sure to yell louder each time. 

  I watch him as he backs away from the window and goes down to the ground, disappearing from sight. A scream in agony can be heard throughout the locker room. My little brother, Will, walks up to the round, circular thermometer.

  "We're at 220," he checks before looking back at us. I nod at him as he slowly backs away from it and stands back in his place.

  Billy suddenly erupts with tears that can be heard all around. Confusion washes over my face, everyone else has a similar or exact facial expression.

  "It's not my fault. It's not my fault, y/n. Please, I promise you, it's not my fault."

  I got this urge to walk towards him as soon as I heard my name. No one stopped me, so I continued to slowly walk over to the door.

  "What's not your fault, Billy?" I ask him.

  "I've done things, y/n," he hesitated, "really bad things. I didn't mean to."

  His voice was so soft, all I wanted was to get him out and bring him into a hug.

We've been going through this phase of acting like a couple, but not really being official. It basically all started when he decided to make the first move in school and talk to me. Honestly? I didn't think I'd get the chance with him because every girl at school wanted him. But somehow, I did and I'm very thankful for that. He doesn't flirt with any girl unless him and I are in a fight, in which he tries to make me jealous. Max always told me how fond he is over me. But I mean, there's still a small part of me that thinks he's just doing this little thing we have for fun.

  "He made me do it," Billy says in a quite tone.

  "Who made you do it?" I wondered.

  "I don't know, it's like a shadow."

  Will and Eleven exchanged glances.

  "Like a giant shadow," Billy continues, "please, y/n."

  "What did he make you do?"

  "It's not my fault! Okay, y/n? Please," he whines as a tear started to slip down from my eye, "please believe me, y/n. It's not my fault!"

  I couldn't help myself as more tears streamed down my face.

  "I tried to stop him, okay? I did. Please believe me, y/n. Please believe me."

  I know it's not his fault. I remember that night before he started acting all weird. He told me someone attacked him.

  "Billy, it's gonna be okay," I put my hand up on the window.

  I regret everything I did that night.

  "It's okay, we want to help you. You just have to talk to us," I said.

  He squirmed around on the floor as I kept on trying to reassure him. I couldn't stop thinking about how this was basically all my fault.

  I overhear Will whisper something to Mike but I don't pay much attention. My only focus was Billy and trying to get him to talk to me.

  "Y/n, get away from the door," Mike calmly says.

  "What?" I asked, confused.

  "Get away from the door!" He screams.

  Before I could say anything, Billy smashes through the glass and reaches his arm out towards me. And that's the last thing I saw.

  I jump up from my bed, realizing I woke up from a nightmare. I glanced around the area of my bedroom. Boxes are surrounding the room from all the packing my family has been doing. I take a few deep breaths to try and calm myself down.

  Usually, when I have a nightmare, I would bike over to Billy's and sneak in his bedroom. He would hold me in his arms as I fall back to sleep in his bed. I always make sure to escape and go back home before his dad woke up.

  A realization kicks in, he's not here to comfort me anymore. It was just last week when I watched Billy sacrifice himself to the Mind Flayer to save Eleven.

  I grabbed a sweater and some sweatpants from one of my packed boxes and put them on. I stroll over to my door and peak out, making sure no one was awake in the house. Swiftly, I walk out of my doorway and towards the front door. Then, carefully opening the door and sneaking outside. After quietly closing it, I turn around and grab my bike that was sitting up on the side of our house. I hopped on it and peddled down the driveway. Riding towards the road before turning to the direction of the town's cemetery.

I needed to see him, even if it's not physically.

...

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