Scarred For Life

Chapter 53

*
Amina was relentless.

"I want to go home this instant," she said, while Ibrahim kept his hands on her shoulder with a solemn look in his eyes.

"You cannot leave just yet," Afrah said, sitting at the foot of the bed. "The doctor says you aren't ready."

"Why should I care what some amateur doctor thinks?" she spat, glaring at the IV hooked up to her. "I'm leaving, and all of you are welcome to try and stop me."

"Amina," their mother said from the chair by the window, "if you move an inch from that bed, you'll have to answer to me."

Amina narrowed her eyes defiantly as she looked up at her, meeting her mother's hardened gaze head on. Her adamance remained for only a few seconds however, as she finally bowed her head in defeat.

"Isn't that better?" Ibrahim sighed, keeping his hands on her as she leaned back onto the propped up pillow behind her.

"Don't start with me," she glowered at him.

"I wouldn't dream of it," he said, a grin spreading across his lips. Amina bit her lip as she felt her eyes beginning to water.

"Can I speak with Afrah alone?" she asked, staring pointedly at the wall.

Minutes later, Ibrahim and her mother shuffled out of the room, leaving the two in an uncomfortable silence. Afrah fiddled with the hem of her dress, refusing to look up at Amina. She was afraid that she would do something silly like bursting into tears when their eyes met.

"Do you have any idea how uncomfortable these hospital beds are?" Amina asked, pushing down on the mattress. "I swear it's like trying to sleep on plywood."

Afrah tried to laugh, but the sound got stuck in her throat.

"Stop it," Amina said, focusing on Afrah.

"Stop what?" she asked, still refusing to look at her.

"Damn you, Afrah," she groaned. "Look at me."

Slowly, Afrah dragged her eyes to hers, flinching when she saw the tears streaking down her cheeks.

"I don't want to think about it," Amina held back a sob. "If I stop to think about it... If I stop for even a moment, I might just..."

Afrah reached across and took her hand in hers while Amina broke down into tears. Afrah's tears flowed as well, triggered no doubt by seeing her sister so broken. Amina, who was always so cool and collected, was nothing more than a shadow of her former self as she squeezed Afrah's hand.

"It wasn't your fault, Amina," she said. "There was no way you could have known."

"I know," she sobbed. "But why does it still hurt so much?"

"Because you loved your child," Afrah said. "What happened was cruel, and I cannot pretend to understand what you must be going through. But you are the strongest person I know, Amina. You will overcome this, Insha Allah. Don't allow yourself to sink into a pit of despair."

"Did you know it was going to be a girl?" Amina smiled through the tears. "We were going to name her Safiya, just to mock aunt Safiya. I begged Ibrahim not to tell any of you, because I wanted it to be a surprise. It was our little secret."

Afrah felt her heart break a little bit more.

"I know I shouldn't dwell on the thoughts of the past," she said. "I know it's ridiculous to waste my time thinking about what was; what could have been. None of it is going to bring her back. But I can't help it."