Chapter 12

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The water’s surface went farther and farther away from her. She sunk in the dark water. It embraced her. Not in the way the scuba divers so lovingly say, but in the scary as ** way. Closer to the bottom she could no longer hear the crushing of the waves. Don’t let me die. Don’t let me die. Not like this.

     Nobody could save her down there. If she was to survive she had to save herself. But panic struck her and she couldn’t move. She tried to scream, but all that came out was bubbles of air floating up to the surface. Follow the bubbles. She swam with all of her last strength.

     She was just about to reach the surface when something grabbed her leg and drew her back down. She screamed again as she disappeared in the deep of the ocean.

“Ems. Emma!”

     Somebody shook her to wake her up. Her eyes opened slowly to see her parabatai lying next to her in her bed. 

     “Jules?” She looked around in the room and saw that she was in her room. “What happened?”

     “You had a nightmare.”

     She shook her head. “No, what happened? Back at Dylan’s place?”

     “Oh, that. Emma, I thought you’d die.” He hugged her tightly and dug his face into her shoulder. “The ravener poisoned you. If it wasn’t for Malcolm you’d have died.”

     “Malcolm?”

     He rested his head on the pillow next to hers again. “Yeah, the warlock. I called him and asked for his help. No runes could save you. Then he worked his magic on Dylan. He won’t remember a thing.”

     “What? What? This is going too fast. What is he doing with Dylan?”

     “Even if he couldn’t see that you were fighting a demon he did see you fighting. Probably a large dog or something and that would be hard to explain. Malcolm makes him forget.”

     “Forget? How much?”

     “Just the fight, don’t worry.”

     “I don’t like the warlock going near him”, she muttered.

     “It’s easier that way.”

     “I know, I didn’t argue with you.”

     He sighed and moved closer to her. The constant smell of paint reached her. But it was fainter than usual.

     “How long have I been out?” she asked.

     “For about two days.” If she knew him, as she suspected she did, he hadn’t left her side once. She could see a tray of food on the bedside table. The food was untouched.

     “Have you eaten?”

     He hesitated. “Yes.” She raised her eyebrows in a disapproving look. “No.”

     “Jules… You can’t stop eating”, she whined.

     “I was worried.”

     “I’m good now. Eat now.”

     He shook his head so the brown strands brushed her face. “No, I want to look at you for a minute without worrying whether you’d wake up or not.”

     “I won’t leave you, Jules”, she whispered gently.

     He touched her forehead with his lips in a protective gesture. “You can’t.” he tilted her chin so he could look in her eyes. “Because I’d be running after you.”

     Did he understand that with leaving her she knew he’d meant dying? By running did he mean…?

     “Julian!” She hit him in the chest. Gently enough not to hurt him, but hard enough for him to know she was serious. “You will not kill yourself.”

     “I never said I would.”

     “I know what you meant.”

     He turned over to lie on his back. His eyes rested on the wooden ceiling. “I can’t live without you, Ems. I was really worried when I got the call.” He turned over to look at her again. “Dylan called me to tell me the ambulance was on its way to get you to the hospital. He told me you were practically dying. There was barely a pulse. You wanna know what I thought when I heard that?” He continued without waiting for an answer. “I thought that you’d die without me close to you. Without me comforting you.” There was a pause and a slight intake of breath. “Without you letting me kiss you.”

     He kissed her before she could react. His lips were soft against hers. Her heart beat faster than ever and gave no hint that she’d been dying only two days ago. For years she’d thought about this, but never been brave enough to hope for it to happen. It was an impossibility coming true.     

     She moved his hips closer to her. As a response he moved his hands over her thighs and let them wrap around him. He turned over so he was on top of her. He kissed her neck before he suddenly stopped. The bed shook as he bumped down next to her again. They lay next to each other facing their parabatai and best friend. Only a moment ago they’d lain like this. They’d lain like this several times before, but now it was all different.

     “Emma…I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to…” He closed his eyes like he was ashamed of what he’d done.

     “Jules-“

     He shook his head. “No, I’m sorry. I won’t do it again.” He got up from the bed and went over to the door, but turned to face her again. He seemed like he wanted to say something, but in the end he left without a word.

     Left was Emma lying by herself. For a moment she’d thought everything would turn out okay just to be crushed again.

     “Jules, I wanted to kiss you too. Have wanted for so long”, she said, to no one.

Sooo, they kissed. Jemma kissed. And Jules ruined it. At least you’ve got something now, heh? Things are gonna speed up from now on…

 

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