Family Ties

Chapter Eight: Hostile Takeover (by your favorite son of Darkness)

What's up bitchaaaaaas! It's ya boy Colt tyin' up narrators and stealin' ya girls. (Even the side ones) *Insert slicker than ya dick wink.* Anywho! Since the bigmouthed narrator that this numskull of an author hired 'accidentally' tied himself up, I'll be narrating for a good bit. So, while the author is too busy being salty let's go to some things that should have been discussed already. Go! Before she notices! Go slow and her brain won't process that we're going right past her.

Here we are at the quaint little home of Alexander Snider and his once-beloved daughter Maxine. Currently, a fugly as hell priest is holding a conversation with Alexander about Maxine.

"So, you're saying that Maxine blew up the entire living room with something that looked black and came from her body? Since then you've been looking for someone to do an exorcism on her?" Alexander, much like a bobblehead, frantically nods yes. "Then when I heard about what happened with her schoolmate I knew I had to do something more than some late night google searches. And for some reason, I keep thinking it's something to do with what happened at your church years back. She's never been the same since."

That's right, plooooot twist! That priest is the son of the paint bucket Maxine used to redecorate the once tasteless church.

"The only big incident I can think of is my father's passing." Beautiful pain weighs down his voice. Well, beautiful to me, hehe.

"By any chance was he a priest too?" Now let's sit back and watch as it dawns on his face. Cascading like a deadly waterfall... It all starts with a scrunching of eyebrows and then color slowly drains from his face. Beautifully terrifying transformations. "Was your daughter with the group that found the body?" Ahh, sweet rotting denial. His bulging Adam's apple Bob up and down as he nervously gulps.

"No she wasn't... she was actually the one who killed him." Alexander stares at his feet in guilt. Idiot! He acts as if he's responsible for his daughter's actions.

"In all honesty, sir, this tells me that she's not possessed. If she was she shouldn't have been able to walk into a house of God so easily..." Hogwash, his protection barriers are flimsy. Insufficient.

"I'd have to see her to know for sure." Ah yes intuition that's instilled into the priests that oh so mighty approves of! A weak secondary defense system. The one that gave the poor little bitch away in the first place . She never stood a chance and she won't now. Especially with me in the works.

" could be anything else father?" " not that I know of. Like I said I'd have to see her to know." The young priest scratches at his black pant leg. A knock sounds from the front bringing his nervous scratching to a halt.

"If you'll excuse me father." As Alexander is walking down the entry way he gets slapped in the face with pictures of memories. Of Loraine, of Maxine, of the way things used to be. Ooh! I just love narrating! I get rewarded by so many tidbits that I can file away for later and use to manipulate them. Merry Christmas!

"Oh hello detectives how may I help you?" Detective do- I can't do show references!? What kind of stupid bullshit is that? Well the author is a chickenshit, now put the duck tape back on! Or I'll turn your mouth into a beak! Goodbye narrating...

Where were we? "May we come in?" The detectives is standing at the door awkwardly. Damn vampires. I should yank out his fake fangs and shove them into his eyeballs. Anywho! "How long may this take?" "Not long. We just need to ask a few questions about your daughter, sir. We have reason to believe that she was involved in Britianna Watkin's murder, her fingerprints were found at the crime scene."

Took the detectives long enough to show up. I put a lot of work into planting that evidence I should've gotten a reward! Now to watch as all this beautifully unfolds.