Your Guardian Angel (GirlXGirl)

Chp. 31

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JENSON’S POV-

Listening to Riley sleep, watching her chest fall and rise… it was cute. She looked so happy when she slept compared to when she was awake. When she was awake… she constantly looked sad and hurt… and I didn’t know if it was because of me, or something else.

But I blamed myself.

Riley had been in love with me for awhile, months, waiting for me to tell her I loved her back.

And I was starting to think I did… I just didn’t know for sure.

I had never been in love, I had never allowed myself to love, afraid of being hurt and left alone. I had learned that from my dad, then Bren… then Jake. Even though I knew Jake’s death was an accident, he still left me…

And I was scared to feel that pain.

But something between me and Riley… it just felt so right.

There was no trying to explain the way I felt, because I didn’t exactly know how, but I knew the way I felt was different. Yes, I was so comfortable with Jake, and I loved being with him… but to be honest, I never needed him.

I needed Riley though.

She stirred, causing me to snap out of my thoughts, and I studied her face. I touched her full lips, soft and just so… kissable, my fingertips traveled down her face, her skin was incredibly soft… I smiled, why was I enjoying this so much?

I made it to her hair, it was soft and lush, and I could smell it, it was freshly washed and smelt amazing…

I stroked her bare arm, grazing her boob in the process, When did she take her bra off? I felt her round breast… and I was instantly turned on.

What the hell was going on with me?

Don’t act like you don’t know Jenson, you’re sexually attracted to your own best friend.

I had never felt like this before, so how was I expected to know?

Then as I moved my hand slightly to stop touching Riley, her eyes fluttered open, making my heart stop in my chest. She eyed me, “Why are you touching me…?”

It was a funny question, because I didn’t even know why, and I wanted to laugh, but I remained serious. I looked at her, “I… don’t know. You just looked so… peaceful.”

She smiled, “Still doesn’t give me any idea why you’re touching me.”

I squinted, “Because I just wanted to, is that answer enough?”

I could feel a slight play fight coming on, and then all of a sudden, Riley’s lips were on mine.

I felt the explosion of emotions, my heart was racing, and I didn’t know exactly what I was doing until I peeked my eyes open.

Riley was kissing me, but not only was she kissing me, but I was kissing her back to.

And I didn’t want to stop.

It felt amazing, her hands holding my face close to hers, then she was hovering over me, our lips never parting, only for intakes of air. Her hair was draping around me, it was amazing, her hair was like a curtain from the outer world. Her body was in between my legs, pressing herself against my sex, and it felt…good.

Then all of a sudden, she thrusted forward, rubbing me more intimately now, and causing me to moan.

It was an accident or course, but it slipped and Riley’s mouth parted from mine, “God Jenson… that was… sexy…”

I felt myself blush, my face heating as I stared up at her. She was definitely something else… and kissing her, well, that was a whole different story.

She was just looking down at me, expecting me to say something, but to be honest, I was completely speechless.

She tilted her head, “You ok?”

I nodded, I didn’t know what to say, I didn’t want to mess with her head more then I already have… and all of a sudden I felt bad.

Was I using Riley for comfort? Or did I really and truly love her? I had never been in love… so why would I feel in love with my best friend? A girl of that matter? It just didn’t make sense… and I was extremely confused.

I rolled out from under her and stood up, heading to my bathroom, “I’m going brush my teeth.”

She just stared at me, and nodded slightly as I closed the door behind me, resting my back against it. My heart was going a million miles per minute…

What the hell was happening to me?

I started brushing my teeth, brushing them so hard in thought I probably took half my enamel off. I rinsed and looked at myself in the mirror, I looked like I just had…sex.

My hair was frizzed, my clothes were wrinkled and twisted, and my face was flushed and red.

I laughed at the thought of me and Riley actually having sex, but then again… hadn’t we come close to it? The way she grinded against me, it drove me insane, and it made me moan out loud. Also, when I did moan, it seemed to drive Riley insane, causing her to pull away and gather herself.

It was obvious, I was physically attracted to Riley, and vise versa, but are her and I attracted to each other emotionally?

I was stuck on yes, because of the way I felt when she kissed me. It was a longing feeling, as if I needed her to, and when she wasn’t with me… it hurt so frikkin bad.

Did that mean I was… in love with her?

I knew it was a strong possibility, because I had never felt it before in my life, but I was scared to let myself act on the thought.

What if something happened to Riley? What if she realized I’m not what she wanted, causing her to leave me? Would society accept it? My family? Friends? What would happen to me and Riley’s friendship if it didn’t work out?

These were the questions that haunted me…

And they were going to keep holding me back from loving her.