Project Alpha

Ch. 3 - Gone

**A/N: should I write this book in first or third person? This chapter will be written in first just so you know.

I was barely fighting the familiar darkness of passing out while being dragged back to my cell. My face was bleeding a lot and the cold air of the room was really making it sting.

We took a left and a right. Another right, down some stairs and finally left again. I'm surprised Meanie was letting me see this much of the base. Normally, I would've only seen a few hallways including the long one with our cells.

We were now in my normal turf, which I now assumed to be on a lower level of the base or in a basement. For all I knew, this whole place could actually be an underground facility. The cells drew nearer and I sighed, resisting the urge to smile.

The guard holding me unlocked the door and let go, leaving me in there. Then, he walked away to deal with other important issues.

Black spots were appearing in the corners of my vision. I couldn't pass out, I just couldn't. It would show weakness, and that was punishable. Red sparks joined the hazy spots and I knew I would pass out soon. Instead of submitting to my inevitable fate, I waited to hear Bucky's voice.

I laid there on the cool, white tiles, still waiting. After a few more seconds, I decide to call out his name, "Bucky?"

His response never came. My heart rate quickened and my breathing became more irregular. I was probably having a panic attack. The adrenaline coursing through me kept me awake long enough to ponder the mystery.

Maybe I was just being a little paranoid. Bucky wouldn't leave me behind, nope, never. We had always fantasized about escaping the grasps of Hydra, but all those daydreaming sessions had been together, always with each other.

"You'll always be here, with me?"

"I'm with you until the end of the line, pal."

His words echoed in and out of my head, bouncing against my skull like a bouncy ball hitting the wall. Bucky had meant what he said didn't he?

Normally when one person came back from the usual testing and re-education, the other would be here to comfort them and talk with them. But Bucky wasn't.

I was just going stir crazy, right? That any second now, Bucky is going to walk through that door with a guard and direct him back across the hall from me after a successful mission. Then, I would help the Winter Soldier recover back to the Bucky I know, like I usually could. He would then tell me more about World War II, and Steve.

I'm going insane. I needed Bucky. He'll be back soon, yes? These thoughts plagued me until I managed to curl up and fall asleep.

***

"Bucky, are you okay?" I asked Bucky right after a mission. He smiled at my younger self when the guard was out of his sight. It was the first mission I had ever seen my friend go on.

"I am now." I must've looked confused, for he quickly explained. "Right before I go on a mission, they... They brainwash me."

He paused a second to think, then continued explaining, "They brainwash you to rid you of who you are. I couldn't remember anything, Peter. Thanks for the reminder."

"I don't understand," I murmured, "Why don't they do that to me?" Hydra and the lab scientists never did that to me, ever. I had been on missions in the past, ones that I didn't seem to recall. They only wiped out details about the jobs I had done, so I didn't know how many people I had ever killed.

"You're young, whether you like it or not. You've already been brainwashed before, just in a different way. They taught you that we're doing the right thing.

"Well, they're wrong, kid. Hydra is the bad guy here."

I woke with a start to a small noise somewhere above me. Hoping that it was Bucky, I stayed awake and sat up to rub my eyes. I was a pretty light sleeper, and I think you know why.

I counted off three minutes on the dot when I concluded that nobody was coming. It had been just a silly sound only I could hear due to my enhanced hearing.

I thought about the dream I'd just had. It had happened a few years ago when I was just nine years old. That was the day when Bucky told me the truth, instead of the mangled one Hydra had told me.

Bucky. Even just saying his name kind of hurt. Would I ever see him again? How long had I been asleep? He wasn't back from the mission. Hydra doesn't really send either of us on long term assignments anymore. We stood out a lot, for the same reason.

I glanced to the cell adjacent to me just to be sure, sure that Bucky was gone.

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