Neil.
Funny how I still need to keep myself busy and occupied just to try to forget you on this day.
Pero hindi ko pa rin pala kaya.
Alam mo ba na kung ano-ano ang mga ginawa ko ngayong araw? Sumipag ako bigla. Sinakto ko talaga ang araw ng paglipat ko sa araw na 'to. Because this is one of those days that I remember you the most.
Neil?
Your words still haunt me. They still hurt me.
They still do.
My head could create a thousand songs and poems for you, but I understand that it's not what you need at the moment. Especially not from a person like me.
Anong oras na pero naaalala ko pa rin lahat. My mind is in a haywire. Saan ba ako magsisimula?
Ah. The break-up. Our break-up.
"Wala na 'yung pagmamahal."
That's what you said.
I could still perfectly remember your dead, cold eyes as they stare into mine. Iyon na iyon lang ang sinabi mo. Just 4 words but it made us both speechless. Hiniling ko na sana mali lang ako ng dinig pero hindi. Naramdaman ko 'yon sa'yo.
Naramdaman ko na ayaw mo na. Naramdaman ko na wala na.
It was the case for you, but it wasn't for me. That will never be the case for me. Sa tagal ng katahimikan sa pagitan nating dalawa, I was pressured to give you an answer - an answer that was forced and untrue.
I suddenly had to decide whether I'd keep you or let you go. I wanted the first, but your heart was on the latter.
"Okay."
Iyon ang sagot ko 'diba? Iyon lang kasi ang nakayanan ko eh.
Mahal pa kita pero pumayag ako. Naghiwalay tayo. From the moment you walked out of the door and I was left in that café, I still loved you. From the moment you decided not to look back, I still loved you. From the moment you unloved me, I still loved you.
Alam mo kaya 'yon?
I thought of other reasons why that happened to us. I thought of other excuses that could make you come back to me.
Baka masyado kang mataas para pangarapin ng isang tulad ko. Kaya siguro free trial lang 'yon ng buhay sa akin. Life temporarily allowed me to feel how heavenly it is to be with someone like you.
Maybe I was too young and naive? Maybe you wanted someone at your level; someone great and mature enough not to rely on you all the time; someone independent and can co-exist beside you.
Someone you can love.
At baka hindi ako 'yon.
Darating ang araw na makikita mo na rin ang para sa iyo talaga. And when that happens, I'm sure you'd feel it in an instant. So, don't ever let her go. Don't be like me.
Neil.
Pray for me. Makakalimutan din kita.
---
Document 1.docx Properties
DETAILS
Name:
Document 1.docx
Authors:
El.Amorié Alejandre
Size:
13.69 KB
Last Modified:
February 28,2017 11:43 PM
Location:
C:\Users\El.Amorié Alejandre\Desktop\Noon\Pako
