Falling (Suicidal Bakugou)

Falling with Regret

*same beginning as Falling with Relief until the step forward and off*

Bakugou opens the door onto the rooftop of the UA dorms.

There is a sight breeze that blows past him, ruffling his hair and clothes gently, and his eyes rise to see a beautiful sunny, crystal clear sky brightening the vibrant green horizon. A bird flies by, chirping it's wonderful song.

But Bakugou only feels numb.

The beauty seems out of place.

Why today, of all days, is it so beautiful out?

Is nature teasing him?

Tormenting him about what he could have had?

Bakugou's fuzzy eyes stare straight forward blankly, tear droplets pouring down his emotionless face despite them seeming so out of place on such a canvas.

And still, Bakugou only feels numb.

He steps forward slowly, one foot moving in front of the other.

One at a time.

Until he feels his toes hover above nothing but air.

Bakugou's empty crimson eyes peer downwards and water falls to the ground below in spite of the cloudless sky.

Finally, he'll be free.

His gaze shifts upward for a moment, looking at the sunny sky, his body relaxing and ridding itself of the tenseness and stress it is so accustomed to holding.

A shriek from below does not register in Bakugou's head. All he can hear are his thoughts.

Thoughts that, for his whole life, have only brought suffering...

But now...

There will be no more pain.

He closes his eyes calmly.

He steps forward.

And falls.

The wind warps Bakugou's clothing, howling loudly in his ears, and the odd prolonged pull of gravity registers coolly in Bakugou's mind for a moment.

For a moment, everything is fine.

For a moment, he knows that everything will be better.

For that single moment, he is filled with relief and calm.

He will be gone.

At last.

He won't make problems for anyone and nobody will be able to do the same to him.

Then his eyes open and terror-filled realization grips at him, clawing at him from the inside and out.

Bakugou's face morphs into an expression of panic, tears going into the sky more rapidly and sobs wrack his body. His eyes widen impossibly, blood shot and looking—searching desperately—for help.

But he is midair.

There is no help here.

He flails his limbs around for some sort of grip to stop his rapid descent towards death.

But he is midair.

There is nothing to grip.

Instead, the fast wind flowing around him only forces his limbs back upward on the same track as his flood of tears, increasing its speed as his descent quickens its pace.

He can't even get his arms down to use his quirk. He would only fall faster if he were to ignite it now.

He can't even save himself.

Tears fall more quickly like a plea for a savior.

A plea that somehow...someone would be able to rescue him.

Save the life that he so readily tried to throw away.

But now he knows that this is not what he wants.

He wants to live.

So, so badly.

The bright sky taunts Bakugou. But at the same time, he wishes that tears wouldn't obstruct his vision of the sun. Oh, how he wishes he could have seen the smile that is so much like the sun just once more.

But instead,

he is falling to his death.

There will be no more chances to see that brightly smiling boy.

No more chances to tell him his feelings.

No more chances to have that cheerful redhead's arm flung over his shoulder.

No more chances to live out his life with the one he loves.

The only thing he will ever have during the rest of his pitifully shortened life is regret.

Regret that he cannot live.

It's his own fault.

Sobs wrack Bakugou's trembling body. He weakly cries out for some sort of savior.

Why has nobody saved him?

Why is the world so unfair?

Why did he do this to himself?

Gurgled shouts that seem as though they are underwater filter into Bakugou's mind.

Who is that?

Is there more than one person?

Could they save him?

Somehow?

He threw it away, but...

Could they give him a second chance at life?

He knows now. He didn't before, but...

He doesn't want to die.

SPLAT

———————————————————

Studies have been done on suicides and this is a more realistic scenario than last chapter. People are sure of their decision to end their own life until there is no going back, at which point they are more terrified and filled with regret than ever before. It is a terrible situation to put oneself into when there are other options before they take that final step that cements their decision. That step is death more than the fall itself. There are always other options before that step, so please seek them out.💙💙

-Angry
Word Count: 727