The Last Cotillion

Chapter 16

Back in New York, her husband deceased, she could do nothing but push forward. This repetitive theme in her life was growing tiresome, but she was determined to not let the sadness of Tom's death negatively impact the health of the baby she was carrying. During her first doctor's visit to confirm the pregnancy, she observed the women in the office performing their assigned task. Typing, taking blood pressure, checking people in for their appointment, watching all the activity around her it occurred to her that being literate was the only way she could afford a decent life for her unborn child. The military insurance from her husband's death provided funds enough to cover expenses through the pregnancy, perhaps the first year if she was extremely frugal with her spending. Her early years without money to do as she saw fit had been rough, she was not going to put her child through that. With a commitment to the future, she began working on her General Education Development certificate, having the equivalence of a high school diploma would at least allow her an office job. She committed almost every waking hour to her studies, a complete focus on passing the exam. If she was careful with how she managed her finances, she could complete the GED and start to work after the baby was born. Obtaining this goal would leave her cash for a safety net.

Her money stretched further than expected as her guardian angel paid regular visits. She relaxed a little knowing he was still nearby; his presence regularly confirmed by events occurring which defied explanation. One afternoon, she returned home from a doctor's visit to find the delivery boy from Mr. Pong's grocery store, delivering groceries to her. She was concerned as she had not ordered anything. The items had been paid for by someone who wished to remain anonymous. She was grateful for these events, gifts pure and simple.

After the baby was born, another act of kindness occurred, her apartment rent for several months was paid in full by Mr. Anonymous. When the landlord gave her the news, she begged him to tell her who the generous person was. He said, in his heavy Puerto Rican accent, "An envelope with cash and instructions was under my door this morning. A typed-out letter, specifically stating your name and apartment number along with a large amount of money was in the envelope. I counted it twice, it was twelve months rent paid in full."

Again, she had no idea who it was or why they did it but was forever thankful for the kindness shared. It was with this gift that she decided to seek a higher level of learning, she began her search for enlightenment. She was compelled to explore opportunities allowing her to give back, just as she had received. Having completed her GED with a near-perfect score, she began her search for a school of higher education, exploring different courses of study, reading all she could. She continually, whether subconsciously or not, found books addressing the subject of rape. Having been a victim herself, she was intrigued by the information occupying the pages. This new knowledge provided her with a means for releasing her past demons. This exploration and release created a desire to befriend others who had been victims of unwanted aggression. Continuing on with the research of psyche and fact, she chose to pursue work in the field of psychology. Her heart told her she was on the right path, her focus never wavered as she applied to Barnard College; she was accepted and would begin classes the following fall term. The first year of school was tough, but she managed quite well. As a scholarship recipient receiving funds for tuition and books, she was set for the year. Beatrice focused on the present, worry was not a luxury she had time for, focus on the following years would be addressed when necessary. The school offered a work-study program explicitly designed to assist widows of the war, she utilized this service to land a job working as a professor's assistant in the psychology department. This provided her additional resources and insight into the field she planned to work in. The young woman who lived next to her worked opposite hours of Beatrice's school obligations. They agreed to trade off childcare, saving each of them money and giving them solace that their child would be well taken care of. Trusting someone with her child again was a healing moment for Beatrice. She held on to her faith, pushing through the fear.