The Last Cotillion

Chapter 21

Mom and I remained seated across from each other, me listening intently, unable to speak. The information she shared was overwhelming, something out of a movie. As fate would have it, I was the grandchild of two amazing women who did what they had to do to survive. Gaining perspective as to why my grandmother behaved as she did was shocking and hearing of the childhood atrocities she faced, it all made sense. Shifting in my chair in the noisy restaurant, I looked around at everyone living their lives, pondering who needed to be touched, who was in need of help to be healed. Had we all just become cogs in the wheels of the daily grind? How many of us really spent time walking through our pain to find healing? Who of us is under a loved one's control and doesn't know how to get out?

Glancing at my watch I was surprised to see three hours had passed, I had listened the entire time while my mom told the stories of these two amazing women.

That day's new information shared lit a small flame in me that would grow, eventually changing my life forever. As my mom looked at me, she smiled with a look only a mother can give, a smile of love and hope.

Settling our bill, I left an extra-large gratuity to the waiter for his time, pushed back from the table, stretched, and walked my mom to her car. I needed to thank my mother for sharing this story with me. Also, to thank her for being kind enough to develop respect for my grandmother after so many years. Taking the car keys out of my mother's hand, I unlocked her door, handing the keys back to her. I opened her door and waited for her to take the driver's seat. She stood beside the car for a moment looking for the words she needed to say before settling in. Looking up, she began to explain how Grandmother's jewelry came into her care.

"Mary had left a note for your dad to retrieve them from her safety deposit box. She had two purposes in giving them to me. One was to present them as a gift to say thanks, acknowledging the hard feelings between us through the years and, two, requesting they be passed on to her grandchildren. In addition to the jewelry, an envelope addressed to you was given to me for you as well."

She continued telling how Grandmother acknowledged her desire to reach out to Beatrice but never managed enough courage to do it.

"Your grandmother followed Bea's career until her final visit in the hospital last year, reading her column in the paper, making anonymous donations to any foundation noted in her column. Mary could never be sure how your dad would receive the information and couldn't bear the thought of losing him after all these years. She assured me all the money left from your grandfather was spent supporting Bea's causes. Now I understand her pain and how difficult the decision was for her to share this story with me before she passed."

Softly touching my hand, she said

"Son, promise me you will never hide your light. Never carry shame with you for what others have done to you".

I closed her car door and began to walk away. She gently tapped her horn to get my attention, when I turned, she had rolled down her window.

"In her final hours, your grandmother had become quite lucid, she was fully aware of her surroundings. It was obvious to me the time for her to go was near. I said my farewells and moved away from the bed to leave that room for the last time. Standing in the hallway, I heard her speak to your father, 'You were my greatest gift in life. If my journey had to be hard - I am forever grateful I had the love of my life with me through it all. I could not have imagined a greater dance partner.'

I returned home that afternoon, reflecting on life. Sitting at the kitchen table, admiring the jewelry she left to me, the phone rang. It was your dad on the other end of the line informing me Mary was gone. He said her final words were odd to him but thought I would understand what they meant."

"Mom held my hand firmly, and with her eyes closed, she said, 'Forgive me, Beatrice, forgive me...'"

The End