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"He won't stop crying!"
"Sade don't get frustrated.. Did you feed him?"
My mom asked as she fixed me some tea. I nod my head slowly feeling the inside of my head pound. I've been up with Sire for literally twelve hours straight. I just can't close my eyes for a break. My mom told me to come back to LA to get some help. I flew back, but Osaze for some reason decided to stay in Atlanta because his friend had some event that felt like was more important than his 2 month old child.
It's been rough for the past week, I know exactly what it is too. I'm having a bad case of postpartum. It wasn't this bad with Aaliyah and Jayden, until he had passed. So, I'm trying not to let it hurt me as much as it is.
"Can you make him another bottle?" I ask rubbing my forehead.
"Yeah, give me a second." Mama says softly. "Where is your baby father?" She asks curiously.
"Um I don't know." I say rolling my eyes. "Can you figure it out for me?"
Mama walked into the living room and handed me the bottle and sat my cup of tea. I sigh softly and put Sire in his car seat that was sitting on the floor. I sat down on the couch listening to his crying seize a little bit. A small frown formed on my face as he got a little louder.
"Oh.. my fucking.. God." I say palming my face.
Mama stood up and grabbed Sire, laying him on her chest. He stopped crying and closed his eyes for a little bit.
"When was the last time you talked to him?" Mama asked patting Sire's back.
"Last night." I say softly.
"You don't think he's doing something he doesn't have any business doing, do you?"
"Mama I don't know." I say closing my eyes. "But, I do know that I'm going to sleep." I say kicking my feet up on the couch.
~
~
~
I watched and laughed as Bey, Milan, and Valencia all tried to play with Sire to make him stop crying. It was hilarious watching five grown women, including me and mom, try and comfort a baby. I cannot say that I'm too mad anymore. But, I am still kind of pissed at Osaze. I don't think I've ever been so mad at him.
"Sade you got a crier!" Valencia said out of breath from all her dancing.
"I know." I say laughing.
"Where is his daddy?" Bey asked sitting on the couch next to me. "You wanna talk about it?" She whispered to me.
I shake my head. "There's nothing to really talk about." I roll my eyes. "We haven't talked since last night and all he said was 'I called to tell you good night baby' and then he hung up. Didn't even say I love you." I say softly.
