GRAFFITI | Jookyun ✓

#7

Trigger warning - Panic attack

~Jooheon~

I took his hands, placed them on my chest and stared deeply into his eyes hoping to reach him. I slowly took a deep breath in and out. My mouth made movements for deep breathing to show him how to breathe normally. He needs a breathing rhythm and i really tried my best to show him but it was really hard to calm him down when he can't hear me. I did it for several minutes but his condition was the same.

I felt helpless and useless at the same time. I am his best friend and can't even calm him down?... I really don't know how. It hurted so much to see him like this. Water is running from his eyes and his nose, his face blue, but he's still breathing heavily and sometimes he let out a loud scream like he got thunderbolted all of a sudden.

In complete desperation I pressed him even closer to me, stroked him and put my cheek to his ear and started humming. The same song he was humming today. I knew he wouldn't hear it but maybe I did it to calm myself down until the ambulance is here? "Hmmm hmm mmm~~" i hummed into his ear.

Out of desperation I already had tears in my eyes and all over my face as well. At first nothing happened as I started humming, but then his breathing calmed down a bit. When I realized that he calmed down, I hummed the song a bit louder. It calmed me down - and apparently him too. B-bu-but that means that he can really hear me, right? I stopped humming as his breath was a bit more normal.

"Changkyun?, Can you hear me?" I whispered into his ear a little bit afraid. "Hmm?" he whimpered like he was gonna start crying again. "Hey, Kyunnie! Do you hear me?" I asked a bit louder this time. Changkyun started crying again "Y-yeah i can hear y-you". It looked like he didn't really understand the situation. He really can hear me! My mouth was wide open, but not a word came out. I was too overwhelmed by this situation. He really heard my words and answered my question!

He pulled a wry face and his breathing got worse again. "Mom! D-Don't leave! Plea-" His voice crackled and he started panicking again. Fuck. I carried him up the stairs to the entrance, where we impatiently waited for the ambulance to come. I opened the door for some fresh air and hummed the song again maybe he can hear it a third time today? I was humming a few notes when the ambulance stopped at my door. I jumped up and waved at them. "H-here! My friend needs help!" i yelled towards their direction.

Two men ran towards us. One of them had a large suitcase with him. They laid Changkyun down on the floor, but he resisted and screamed again. The doctor asked me to hold his legs up to bring the blood back to his head because it was still blue. "Sir? Can you hear me? - Sir?" One of them asked Changkyun.

"He's deaf, he can't hear you." I added as there was no reaction from Changkyun. He didn't seem like he was gonna stop crying and screaming. One of the men measured his pulse and shone a flashlight in his eye to check his reaction and the other one prepared a needle. He looked for a vein and stinged the needle under his skin, into the vein. He removed the needle so there was only a tube inside his arm. It was hard, because Kyunnie was moving and screaming continuously but somehow he managed hit the vein nevertheless.

It shot through my head like lightning. Medicine! "Changkyun needs his medicine! He's on medication, but I don't know what kind of!" i said to the two men. "It's okay, we need to calm him down and get him to the hospital safely before we do anything else. Don't worry, calm down. Nothing will happen to your friend, I promise." the black haired man said.

The emergency doctor connected an infusion to Changkyuns access, like the other man commanded him. It doesn't take long until Changkyuns moves got slower and his facial expression normalized a bit. A few moments later he was quiet. "We've given him a sedative. He seems to be having a panic attack. But we'd like to check him at the hospital if that's possible. Would you like to come with us?" The doctor asked and i nodded in agreement.

They carried Changkyun to the car, fastened the divan bed on which he rested and the other one started the engine. It took a quarter of an hour to get to the hospital. I held and stroked Changkyun's hand the whole time, to show him that I was with him. "He's so lucky to have a great boyfriend like you." The man in uniform said as a goodbye. I blushed at the word boyfriend. "Uuuh-Uhm we're not in a relatio-" I stuttered but he ignored my words and Kyunnie moved again with a still uncomfortable facial expression.

I stroked his hands and hummed the song again, hoping that he can hear me. I walked next to him as the nurses picked him up from the emergency room and brought him into another room. "If you need something you can call us with the red button on his bed. You can stay here over the night and take care of him, if you want to." The nurse said as she closed the door. So here I was with a euthanized Changkyun next to me. At least his breath was normal again and his face colour as well.

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I accidently forgot to upload this chapter. Or maybe wattpad is clowning me again... idk