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i - at that time, when we were seventeen

it has been 133 weeks since the first time i posted this photo. it was my first open letter through the caption to you that i have just revised. i was embarassing myself because my grammar was terrible. it was way more simple if i deleted it but i chose to not. there is something about you i cannot easily delete. i made some changes but i hope the idea will stay the same.

perhaps, at that time, i just wanted to say that life was hectic and so were we. i meant like we were on the twelvth grade and unas was one step ahead. we were also two unstable kids; we had just turned into seventeen, hadn't we? becoming adult was not easy. our mental was not ready that was why we fucked up. then, we ended up losing each other. everyday felt like hell since you walked away. we had been stranger to each other.

you know, at that time, i thought that i fell out love. i thought that i finally managed to move on, but i did not. i just tried to make some things worked as you did. as i was way too busy, i was lost track. however, i had never lost feeling for you. i was just ignoring it; my feeling(s) for you. i was wondering, from all the boys over the world why it has to be you?

you have not been the best, but why have i liked you this much? it makes me weak. when you said you had missed me, with your silly smile that becomes my favorite smile of yours, i could not help it. i was silent and realised that my broken pieces still missed you too. i wanted to say it louder but i had no power. i wish i had.

i love you.

from 19-year-old me.
(-a)
last edited : 30th of march 2020