He fixed me, and broke me

chapter 2:"hey im bethany"

5 hours later and im to the northern part of L.A where its basically trees and mountains, i start to feel the excitment of my summer, relaxing, quiet, and stress free. My mom sees my face and starts to ask me annoying and useless questions like "do you think this time this camp will help you" but like usually i ignore her and continue to look out of my car window, as soon as i see the sign of my new home for the next three months i can barely sit still and im pretty convinced my mom thinks im having a panic attack so she pulls the car over right before the sign of "steady girls bootcamp" and says beth honey are you ok and i basically scream yes mother, and right after that she turns the car back on and drives into the bootcamp right up to the office for my sign in.

We get out of the car and i take my lugage out of the car i think i might have over packed but like my brother used to say better to overpack and be too prepared than to not be prepared at all,as i drag my bags to the head office of the camp i see girls of all kinds of personalities and and pain and can see right thru most of them and reolize what their thinking of me which is what most girls think everytime i enter these kinds of camps and its usually thinks like what is she doing here, shes too rich to be sick or depressed, but i ignore that because soon enough they will realize how depressed "rich girls " can be. As soon as i take a step into the head office the first person i see is a kind looking women that is thin but has sides medium length,brown hair and about the age of 35 shes smilling at me and seemd to be too nice  to be the directer of this rehab bootcamp thing but appereantly she is, hello beth well can i call  you that or do you perfer your full name the director asks me as i reply um you can call me what ever you want,she smiles at me once again and says well i and everyone els here at this "speacial" camp have been waiting anxiously for you were glad to have you here and we will make sure that it will be the last time you'll ever have to come go one of these places, i sure hope so i hear my mom say under her breath.

My mom and linda which is appereantly the directers name start talking as i gaze out to the window and see girls smoking by the woods but i hope they know that they can be seen and as soon as i finished thinking that i see this older women screming at them and throwing their cigarette on the floor then soon enough there being dragged to the head office which is where i am. my mom and lindas conversation gets interuppted as soon as the lady starts causing a seen and telling linda about what she just saw and you could see the look of disappointment on Linda's face when she recives the news, Emily, Magaret girls what were you thinking you guys were solid just this morning what happend you guys were almost ready to go home says linda and i interupt saying well i can tell you what probably happend they cracked they cant survivie without smoking because they feel as if its their only escape and as i finish margaret the more bigger girl starts saying you dont know nothing little girl your just some spoiled brat that thinks shes depressed because she didnt get her louis vutton purse for her birthday, so why dont you get your spoiled little ass out of my bussiness and i reply, well if i were you i wouldnt judge someone without knowing where the come from, same for you hun says margaret. Ok stop says linda emily, margaret my office i'll be there in 10 and bethany mrs torres please follow me while i take you to betany's dorm so you guys can say your goodbyes and beth can get settled in before dinner.

After like 7 minutes of walking we get to a medium size cabin/dorm that has one other bed, linda points to the emty side of the room and says this side is for you and the other side is your cabin buddy jordan but dont worry shes a nice girl, well i'll give you guys a few minutes to say your goodbyes and bethany as soon as your settled please come back to the head office and ask for melanie and shes your leader kind of but make sure you take no more than 45 minutes  we have to get a lot in for 1 evening and dress comfortable for sundays are the only dress down days for you guys well i'll see you soon and mrs torres please stop by my office before you leave thank you and bye. when linda closes the door my mom sighs and says well my girl i'll leave it here and call me at least one a week and keep in mind if i dont answer its because of work now get your self better not just for you but for your brother he would want this while she starts tearing up i think to myself that he would never want this for me because he always thought posative of me no matter how rude i couldve been to him but my mothers tears wouldnt fool me because if she cared she would have cried at the funeral or the moment she found out not 3 years later!  she gives me a warm hug and says i love you and i do it back and then shes out the door.

I quickly make my bed remembering what linda said based on time and put up my navy blue covers and the thick cover ontop, i finsihed making my bed in 10 minutes so i started pulling clothes out if my luggae and found black jogers and a white tanktop with a black sweater and put it on with my nike running shoes, my hair was about the lenth of my butt and its blonde ombre and was kinda wavy but messy but i didnt care because there was no one to impress so i grabbed my phone in a less visable pocket and left to the head office to meet melanie.As i walked in the dark i suddenly saw a camp fire and  i saw all kinds of girls sitting around the camp fire, like the depressed, the confident,and the better there are many more but my thoughts start taking over my head i thought about the usual things about my brothers death until i reolized i was infront of the office. i took a step inside and i see melanie adams and how do i know how she looks like well maybe because its a girl i used to talk for the first camp i went to and she was in a worse stress level then i was so to see her better then me was kinda shoking but deppresive she gives me a warm but big smile and says bethany is that you what are you doing here i thought you got better 3 years ago, i try to smile and say "so do i" and should we start going now, yes yes of course were going to the camp fire to introduce the summer program girls including yourself, summer program? i reapeat confused, yes summer program this isnt like a summer camp this goes on all year for some girls.We arrive at the camp fire and suddenly all eyes are on me and melanie but i keep a blank expression on my face we sit on a bench and then linda says well hello girls we will be doing an activity called the name game yes many of you think its lame but its a great way to  get to know everyones name and something about themselves now i'll start im the director but please call me linda and i enjoy helping people, next it wad a girl called jennifer and before i knew it,it was my turn and i say hi um my name is bethany you can call me beth and this is my third girls helper camp thing so yeah everyone says hey bethany then move on to the next person.

  About 40 minutes later our group of girls are done with the names we go to the dinner room and have dinner i decide to have the steak and spaghetti instead of chicken and rice while i was grabbing my food then a girl comes up to me and says whats up with you why are you here you seem perfectly fine just a little pissed off, i decide to answer by saying well hi my name is bethany and i have a lot of things wrong with me i just choose to not show emotion, well you dont have to do that here and my name is tania used to have depression now i dont know what i have all i know is that i have something come sit with me we can talk as soon as we sat in an emty table i told tania that i have depression, and i was surprised on how quickly choose to tell this girl my problems,but we just kept talking until we reolized dinner was over and we had to head to our doorms for its a rule to be in their before 10:00pm unless we have a proper excuse so we did as told and decided to finsih the conversation tomorrow.I walked to my dorm and opend the door with a surprise to find my roomate on the floor unconscious.