Like We Used To || Manuel Neuer

11

        As the sun sets that evening, Manuel and I walk down a boardwalk near a beach somewhere in the middle of Brazil, talking about everything and nothing at all. At times, my hostility towards Manu inevitably increases, but Manu's soft, patient nature eventually eradicates the harsh gestures, making me calm once again.

We are about thirty minutes into the walk when I spot Asher standing on the boardwalk by himself, leaning forward on a rail with his eyes plastered on the sparkling water before him. Without hesitation, I rush over to his side, tapping him on his back.

Manuel laughs as he watches me run from behind and catch up with this boy that is supposed to mean everything to me. I can hear the token of my past's footsteps behind me as I turn Asher over by the shoulder and whisper in his ear, "Do something boyfriend-like to me," despite knowing that we're not friends; we're not lovers; we're straddling the dangerous line that lies in between.

"I wouldn't know what a boyfriend does," Asher whispers, his face dangerously close to mine. His breathing is heavy and that's the sole fact that I notice before Asher does the unexpectable: he pulls me into a hug.

"Not going to lie, I thought you two were going to kiss," Manuel says, catching up with Asher and I.

"I wouldn't want to put you in that uncomfortable position, bro," Asher says smoothly. "Some things only happen behind closed doors."

Manuel brings his hands to my cheeks and strokes it softly, staring at me as he says to Asher, "I wouldn't keep her hidden behind a closed door."

I bring Manuel's hands away from my face; I don't want to let go of it so soon, but I ultimately do.

"It's whatever. Azelie, I was just about to head back to my place. You want to crash with me tonight?" Asher asks.

"Yeah, sure," I begin, and Manuel raises and eyebrow. Upon seeing him, I add, "But let's meet up after I finish catching up with Manu."

"Alright, love," Ash murmurs, pecking me on the cheek. "See you then."

And then he's gone.

Before I know it, Manuel and I are walking again. This time around, the walk is done in silence, twinged with an awkwardness that hadn't existed before. But Manuel eventually breaks it and what he says kind of makes the awkwardness a thousand times worse.

"Maybe Asher and you and Kathrin and I should double date someday."

Shut up, Manuel! Don't bring your stupid girlfriend into this, I want to shout, but I don't. In fact, I don't do much; I simply continue walking, murmuring a simple, "Maybe we should" in compliance. "But as long as you promise to feed me more than leaves for dinner."

"Leaves?" he asks, clueless. "What do you mean?"

I roll my eyes. "Nevermind."

"No, tell me."

"Because, well, last night," I try to explain, "You took me to a dinner and ordered salad and the order was minimal."

"Oh, right."

"I mean, feed me real food next time, Manuel. That's all."

Manu laughs. "If we're going on a double date, we'll have to settle with leaves. They're Kathrin's favorite food."

I gag. "Food? You call that food?"

"Well, she's a vegan. There's not much variety."

"When you were younger, you used to make fun of vegans," I point out.

"When I was younger, I also thought that I would marry you."

I gasp. "What's wrong with that?"

"Nothing—nothing at all."