butterflies flames

17

Meet yourself, a girl with so many insecurities and scarred from so many battles, so many wounds left unhealed; a girl with so many traumas and yet still surviving till today; a girl with so many thoughts eating her up and so lost in life, yet still here surviving till this day. It’s tough for this girl, which is yourself. Even though there were times she wanted to give up, but she held on, fearing what might happen if she gave up, fearing what might happen to her family and friends. She held on.

This girl, she’s selfless. There are multiple times where she has given up the importance of herself just to help others who are in need. Sometimes even going as far as helping till she loses a part of herself, which is a bad thing, but the point is she’s just a girl who wants to help others when she could. She often forgets her own importance because of it too, but this girl is a very precious person to countless people and has helped people more than she thinks.

This girl, she’s very kind towards others. She never would want to not help another person. Even though sometimes she hesitates, but helping others was always her priority and she found joy in helping others. Though it drains her out a lot of times, she still never fails to try her best to help her friends who needs her help.

She’s also very caring towards others. Even when she’s feeling so low, she’ll still take the tiny bit of time to ask her friends if they’re okay. She would also put little cute notes onto things she gives her friends just in hopes to cheer them up or make them smile a little. She always goes an extra mile to put the little things into the gifts, to make them memorable.

She likes to bake and has the passion to bake. A lot of times, she likes to bake and give them to her friends. She loves to bake cookies out of all the things because who doesn’t like cookies? For her, cookies spread happiness and cookies means happiness, it wouldn’t hurt anyone to spread some joy, right?

She also can play the piano, even though she has lost a part of passion towards it but she knows she still loves to play the piano deep down inside her heart. She loves music and it means the world to her to be able to play music and understand music.

She is very empathetic. No matter how much someone has done her wrong, she will find a way to understand the other person’s reasonings and put herself in the other person’s shoes. An example would be even when someone tries to find fault with her, she’ll stay down and humble and try not to cause more problems, and even try to understand the other party’s thoughts and feelings and reflect on herself to see if she has done anything wrong to trigger that emotion of the other party. This is one of the strongest points of her.

She is open-minded as she tries to understand people’s different perspective on things and different opinions of people around her. It doesn’t matter if it’s good or bad, she will still try to understand it. She thinks it’s good to try to understand instead of jumping into conclusions, even though she still does it unconsciously, but she doesn’t mean it a lot of times.

She is also reliable as she can understand people’s struggles a lot of times. Her friends would usually find her and talk to her about what’s bothering them and she’ll try her best to comfort them even though she’s not the best at comforting people, but she still tries to make them feel better and ease their thoughts even if it helps a bit.

She loves to write out her thoughts and feelings even if it sounds random. In a way, it soothes her because it feels like she’s not being suffocated, pouring out her feelings and thoughts onto a piece of paper makes her feel so much better. She has a way with words, even though her vocabulary isn’t as wide as many writers, but she could make it expressive through the simplest words.

She tries to do her best in life, even if everything feels like it’s falling, she still tries her best with what she has in her hands and in her heart and in her mind. Even if it looks like the littlest effort, to her it’s a lot of effort and she recognises even the tiniest bit of effort been put into something. People will think she’s lazy, but she’s just a girl trying her best to do the best she could in everything.

This girl isn’t perfect, neither is anyone. But she’s beautiful in her own way, and so is everything. This girl is me.