☼MARK∞
No answer. No eye contact.
Once again Cassidy has flown away into her own planet. Somewhere that even Elon Musk will not be able to go to.
She has started making notches with her fingernails against the wood of the bed post, chipping at the lacquer to get to the wood.
"Why is that?" I tried again. My heart on my closed fist.
No reply.
She has made a little house with the notches. When she finished vandalizing, I caught her wrist gently. "Hey," I whispered, making my voice as non threatening as possible. I knelt in front of her. Her knees in level of my chin, her feet dangling on the bed.
Please, notice me.
"Hey," she echoed softly. Her bright eyes peered down at me, long lashes sticking to her skin. The Pacific has given her sunburn, making the tip of her nose and cheeks rose pink. The way she took her plump lower lip between her teeth and chew at it caught my eye, making me want nothing more but to... but this isn't really about what I want is it?
"Okay," I told her, my thumb stayed on her wrist. Her skin felt so damn fine. Powder soft. So fragile that I could feel her blood rush. "If you don't say a word, I will just assume that you have a thing for me and that's the reason."
I wanted to make it sound like a joke but it isn't. This is serious for me and for her too, it seems. I felt her pulse racing against mine, going faster with every second, like my own. She blinked and removed my thumb on her wrist. Coldness swept all over my body, like laying on an ice tub after a defeat on the field. Here I am kneeling in front of her and she chose to reject me.
But it didn't end as expected.
She took my index and middle finger instead and put it back against her wrist. I felt her pulse racing, even faster than mine. With her eyes on me, she made a fist with her other hand and made a circular motion over her heart. 'Sorry' in ALS.
I returned the gesture, mouthing the word as well. Her small smile made the room brighter than the sun ever could.
Oh, I remember. The thumb has a pulse of its own and I'm doing it wrong. She wanted me to accurately feel how I'm making her feel. Her eyes are cast downward trying to avert mine but I want to look at her. Really look at her. Want to see how hard I can make her blush. My heart is so light that I felt it dropped to the pit of my stomach and then back again. Or melted into a puddle of goo that I'd happily dive into.
I watched her lips as she mouthed the words too, red and damp with tears. Nothing in this world can keep me away from feeling them against mine, now that I know that she might have feelings for me too. My heart thumped loudly against the confines of its cage.
Light from the window shone in the space between us as little dust fairies danced. I reached up to caress her hair, just the feel of it against my fingers was an otherworldly sensation. So soft, so different than my own. Like cashmere threads. The ghost of the kiss along with the slivers of sunshine separating us tasted sweet against my tongue. I rose slowly, crossing the gap between our faces.
"O-ouch."
She bent down sharply, covering her knees with her hands. Our foreheads bumped hard against each other. I didn't realize that my hand has rested on her knees as I pressed at my forehead.
"Are you alright? What's wrong with your knees?" I stayed down.
She shook her head. "I'm fine. I should be going anyway. We may only be here a day but it will be disastrous if Crow Face sent me to the dungeon," her voice is lighthearted again. Another bullet dodged.
