My Savior

{11}

Xavier P.O.V.

Right before he finds Carmen OD....

Parking my car in the driveway I see her father isn't home yet. Going to the side of the house her room is on I climb up to the window and see her sitting on her bed with a pill bottle. Not thinking much I wait for her to notice me sitting there. As she comes out of her bathroom with a glass of water I see her throw all the pills in her mouth and swallow all the water quickly before I would react. Running towards picking up the pill bottle and holding onto her body I repeat "Don't die" over and over hoping she can hear me. As I am reaching for my phone to call an ambulance I see her start to close her eyes. I scream as I see this thinking it will be the last time I see those gorgeous grey eyes of hers.

Falling asleep at the hospital holding her hand is the best way to be able to hold her, but I can't bring myself to let go of her.

Waking up to a doctor coming in I look to my side to see the bed empty and Carmen no where to be seen. Running to the front desk I see her signature on the sign out papers. Why would she leave so quickly? I think to myself as I get into my car speeding to her house hoping to find her there. Parking my car I quickly go to the door and start knocking frantically hoping she's home. When she opens the door I immediately go in to hug her as I back away I cup her cheeks and gently kiss her forehead. Carmen pulls away quickly and ask "What are you doing here," confusion coving her face. "What the hell were you thinking just leaving the hospital like that," I reply with anger in my voice. "It's not a big deal alright," she says as she walks towards her room not looking back to see if I am following.

As I step into the room behind her I see her pick up the pill bottle from when she tried to OD. I rip it from her grip as I yell "Do you have any idea how stupid you are," with fury in my eyes "How am I stupid," she asks as if she knows the answer. "You took this whole d*mn bottle, don't you know you could've died," I say with hurt and confusion in my voice. "Don't you think I know I could've died, that's why I made sure to take the whole bottle hoping for this to end," she says as tears stream down her face. "You meant to die," I say as my voice cracks from the tears gathering in my eyes. "It doesn't matter it didn't work this time did it," she says with no big deal tone in her voice. "What the hell do you mean this time," I yell again with fury evident in my voice. "Don't sit here and act like you care okay this isn't the first time and it probably won't be the last, so can you please just go," Carmen says not looking me in the eyes.

As I am walking towards the door I press a kiss to her cheek and forehead and whisper "I will always care about you." Getting into my car I feel myself boiling in anger and hurt knowing she wants to die. Putting my car into reverse I start driving back to my house to think about everything that just happened. Walking into my bedroom I lay down on my bed trying to calm down my emotions as best as I could.

His room

Waking up abruptly from my nightmare of Carmen dying in my arms that night all over again. The thought of her dying is the worst feeling I've had. I want to do something to make up for yelling at her all the time. I want her to know how much I care for her even if she doesn't believe it. I call my gang and ask if they have found anything on Carmen about her past or even present.

As I get off the phone with my information guys in my gang I am left in confusion. I'm confused at how she could barely have any information on her besides where she goes to school and that her mom passed away in a car accident that she was also in. For as much as I know she lives with her father alone and it's only been them two for the past eleven years. It still doesn't explain where she got all of those bruises on her ribs and back or even why she would want to OD so badly and end her life.