The Curious, The Truth, & The Dead

31

We got home quite late after helping Nick. Mike's party looked fun. Too bad he missed most of it. Everyone was gone, but the remnants of the party were evident. Beer bottles and red cups were left all over the house. Food was spread out all over the kitchen counters. In summary, the house reeked of a teenage party. If only I had been in attendance of such a frivolous event instead of listening to my death sentence.

"Mom and Dad are working late," Mike said when we finally sat down in the kitchen.

I rubbed my eyes, this was all too much. I was tired, I was heartbroken, I just needed a break. I think Mike realized this and nodded to Olivia who came over and sat next to me.

"Do you want to talk about it?" she asked.

"No."

"Do you want to cry?"

"No."

"Do you want us to leave you alone?"

"No."

Olivia sighed and hugged me from the side. "I know I can't help you feel better, but I am here for you, okay?"

I nodded and she and Mike grabbed trash bags and started picking up empty cups. I watched as they cleaned up the party. Eventually, I got up and I tried to help as well. I packed up all the food in the kitchen, but I felt numb. I had no clue what I was doing, I just felt my hands pick up food and put things away, like a robot. It was helpful though, to busy myself with cleaning. Because when I didn't my thoughts were drifting back to Thomas and Jax.

I felt a tear roll down my cheek. I wiped it away and collected the rest of the trash from the kitchen. I went to the family room to grab the trash bags from Mike and Olivia. I walked in on them making out. I rolled my eyes.

Their affection for each other was so clear. I wasn't sure if the idea of soulmates were real, but they already seemed built for each other, it was so obvious. Of course, a love like theirs was meant to last. They were perfect for each other. Good people. Good things happen to good people. My mother had told me that my whole life. If you spread positive energy into the world, you get positive energy back. A love like theirs was real, not orchestrated to please a drug dealer.

I quietly collected their trash bags and the rest of the trash from the room and then quickly left. I threw all of it in the bin and cleaned the rest of the house. I wasn't sure if Mike had told Noah and Lilly about the party but either way they shouldn't have to come home to a dirty house. As I wiped up spilled beer, I thought about the first time I had a beer with Nick and Garrett.

Garrett had been so scared. He thought we would be busted for underage drinking. We were sitting under a bridge, huddled together in the cold. Nick had stolen a beer from some guy at the warehouse and we were all staring at it. It has taken us twenty minutes to figure out how to open it and even then, we continued to stare at it. I think we were all nervous. Whatever little amount of morality we had left was telling up this was a bad idea.

So, I impulsively grabbed the bottle, I drank first and then passed it to Nick. He took a sip and we both had pretended to like it. Just from each other's eyes, we knew both of us had found it to be disgusting. But, we passed the bottle to Garrett anyway, if we had tried it so would he. Garrett had tried to wave us off. He didn't want to be an alcoholic like his parents. He was the good one, he always had been. Garrett was the one who hated stealing, he hated Jax for teaching us how to steal. While Nick and I were more thrilled by the idea. Garrett didn't deserve to die. He was good. He deserved good things.

How was it possible that the bad guys were the ones in control? Why did they get to play God? Threatening Jax and Thomas and the people they loved, planning my death sentence, killing Garrett, and who knows what else. Bad guys didn't follow the rules, and they got away with everything, they could do what they wanted when they wanted. It was the good guys who had to bend to their will and suffer. It wasn't fair.