Kat Calls

Sapphire - Writing process and the ending discussed

Inspiration and Background

The first inspiration to write this story struck in 2017. I was reading a book about abuse, and that kind of sparked a desire in me to explore this topic as a writer.

It was during that time I was also learning more about divorce in Islam. Growing up, I have seen people in my culture treat divorced women miserably - something that never sat well with me. When I learned about Islam's stance on divorce, it led me to feel even more agitated by that kind of narrow-minded behavior.

So I knew I wanted to write about divorce. I knew I was going to make the husband abusive. I knew I wanted the girl to be sweet, sensitive and naive with eyes full of dreams. That was my baseline, the rest kind of followed through.

When I first sat down to write Sapphire three years ago, I couldn't do it. I knew what I wanted to write, I had the emotional depth to tackle the issue - but not enough experience as a writer.

I wanted to do the book the justice it deserved, so I cast it aside for the time being. Meanwhile, I worked on Fallacies of Gold. Even though that series has a 'happier' tone, it does deal with culture, and some character and relationship developments. So after I finished its first draft in May 2020, I knew I was ready to tackle the issues of this story once and for all.

Sapphire had been collecting dust for three years, and it took me two days to complete the first draft. Perhaps less than that. This story has been in my heart for so long, I just knew what to write. The words flowed effortlessly. The characters and scenes just came to me, Subhanallah.

The name of the book

The name Sapphire came to me when I started associating the book with the color blue. Because, you know, the tone and the setting is so sad that thinking about it gives me the 'blues'.

Deciding to write about emotional abuse

I knew I wanted the driving issue behind the couple's divorce to be something subtle. I didn't want the husband to be physically abusive or an adulterer - things people generally deem serious.

Emotion abuse is by no means a less serious matter - I know. But this kind of behavior is not apparent to the untrained eyes. In fact, most people do not even acknowledge emotional abuse exists.

When Neela tried to make her family understand, they dismissed it as 'couple's bickers'. True, elders can often be insensitive to these matters, but you can tell from the way they handled the issue that they really didn't find Sharaf's behavior problematic, or get why she wanted to divorce him.

In fact, I could tell from the comments here on Wattpad that even some of my readers couldn't pick up that the guy is an emotional abuser. You guys showed unwavering support towards Neela, but you couldn't pinpoint the reason behind Neela's distress, or what exactly is wrong with Sharaf.

Which is absolutely okay. This is why I wrote the story - to shed some light on this topic and raise awareness. I designed the couple's relationship after an emotionally abusive relationship I have witnessed in the past. Even though the characters or the events of this book are not real, the abuse I wrote about is extremely real.

Maybe if Neela accepted his apology and gave them a second chance, they could have worked out?

Absolutely not!

Sharaf isn't just a bad husband, he's an emotionally abusive and manipulative man. People like that can't change without professional help.

Besides, even if he ~changed~ and acknowledged his mistakes - why would Neela take him back? He tortured and abused her.

Do you expect victims of sexual/physical abuse to reconcile with their abusers?

Even the thought of it makes us disgusted, right?

So we shouldn't keep such expectations from victims of emotion abuse as well. You can't expect someone to love you again after you have driven them to a certain point.

Ending note

This story is very, very close to my heart.

If you have been following my writing for a while you know it's very different from anything I have ever written.

Neela, hands down, is my most favourite character I have created so far. Starting from her innocence and the goodness in her heart, to her strength and resilience - I love everything about her. Her development in the story still brings me to tears - and the fact that through out it all, through all the suffering - she never once lost sight of hope for a better future. She is a sweet, soft-hearted girl; yet she refuses to take anything less than what she believes she deserves.

I also, might, turn it into a series called the Jewel series. The first book is about emotional abuse, of course. I plan to make the second, Ruby, about sexual abuse.

However, I can't promise I'll end up writing Ruby for sure. Maybe in three years, when I fail to shun the persisting thoughts of the girl in red, we'll be here talking about it again lol.