Like Patchwork

Chapter 4

Sunday, June 17th, 2018: 7:07 AM

"Virgil?" Roman asked, "Virgil?" He tried again, kneeling down next to the couch where Virgil was laying. Despite the fact that Virgil's eyes were open, he didn't respond. It was then that Roman realized that there were tears streaming down Virgil's face, "Woah," Roman said, taken aback: Virgil did not cry in front of Roman: Not anymore. "I... Virgil, what's going on?"

It was silent for a few moments before Virgil sniffed, scrunching his eyes shut as more tears came down his face, "Roman," he said quietly, voice rough and desperate, "I need to tell you something."

———

Tuesday, August 18th, 2020: 11:34 AM

Virgil brought his hand up to his face, chewing lightly on his thumbnail. He had arrived 15 minutes earlier, and was seated in the corner booth that had quickly become Remy and Virgil's spot whenever they visited the small coffee shop. Remy had assured him multiple times that the location and time of their meetup hadn't changed since Wednesday. Still, as Virgil checked the time once more, he wondered if Remy had changed his mind. When Remy finally walked in the door two minutes later, Virgil breathed a sigh of relief. "Hey babe," Remy said, plopping down to Virgil's right, "Sorry I'm late. There was a crazy accident near home, I had to take a wild detour to get here,"

Virgil took a breath, reminding himself that everything was okay and that Remy was there before speaking, "'s okay Rem, 'm just glad you made it." It was quiet for a moment before Remy cleared his throat, Virgil taking a sip of his tea (he was too anxious for caffeine).

"So..." Remy started, rubbing his neck, "I just wanted to apologize about what happened on Wednesday. I'm so sorry."

"Re-" Virgil interrupted but Remy stopped him, shaking his head.

"No Virge," he said softly, "I need to tell you this, okay?" Virgil just nodded, frowning and hunching over slightly. Remy continued regardless, "I want to say that it will never happen again but, I can't promise that." Suddenly, Remy grabbed something out of his bag, sliding it over to Virgil. It was a notebook, opened onto a page divided into two columns: labeled triggers, and how to help.

"What is this?" Virgil questioned, looking at the blank page.

"It's so that I can help you, hun!" Remy exclaimed, "On the left you write your triggers, and on the other side you write what helps you with those triggers, so that if we ever have another incident like Wednesday, I can find a way to help you. Especially because I can't always have contact with your dads. Is that okay hun?" Remy asked, hands clasped within each other.

"Oh-" Virgil said, voice cracking, "I mean, yeah, I, yeah. Definitely. Yeah. Um. Thanks," Virgil said, blushing, "Um, I'll just start, doing, working on this. Yeah." Virgil grabbed a pen as he addimently avoided eye contact with Remy. After a few seconds of silence interrupted only by Virgil's fingers tapping the table, Remy sighed.

"Virgil, are we okay? You're obviously uncomfortable around me and I can't help but feel like I royally fucked up on Wednesday. Do..." Remy hesitated, "Would you rather we not hang out anymore?" He asked sincerely, looking at Virgil.

"No! that's not, no I-." Remy raised an eyebrow, unconvinced "I just... it's just, my, no-"

Remy exhaled slowly nodding, "It's fine, you don't have to lie, Virgil. I'll go." Remy quickly grabbed his bag and made to leave, only stopping when Virgil grabbed his hand.

"Remy, will you just, just listen to me?" Virgil said obviously agitated, "Please?" Remy sat back down, face blank. Virgil cleared his throat, muttering something under his breath.

"What was that, hun?" Remy asked, unsure if he was supposed to have heard the comment. Virgil murmured quietly again, not meeting Remy's eye. Remy's face softened as he said, "just one more time, a little louder, Virge?"

Virgil inhaled shakily, licking his lips, "I..." he started, squeezing his hands into fists, "I wanna be your boyfriend!" Virgil rushed, eyes squeezed shut.

"What?" Remy questioned after Virgil had remained silent for a few moments.

As if a dam had opened, Virgil suddenly began speaking quickly, "I wanna be your boyfriend! And-and go on dates and all that shit. I-I just, I just panicked because my brain is an idiot and I thought you would hate me and I, I didn't, I-"

"Woah," Remy interrupted, presently ignoring the fact that Virgil had just admitted he wanted to date Remy and focusing instead on trying to slow Virgil's panic, "Hey pumpkin, it's okay, I promise it's okay, can you just take some deep breaths with me?" Virgil stuttered in a breath, wrapping his arms around his stomach as he wheezed.

"Sorry." Virgil whispered once he had regained control over his breathing.

Remy shook his head fondly, smiling a bit, "No need to apologize, hun. Let's try this again, huh?" For a split, panic-inducing second, Virgil was afraid Remy wanted him to explain everything again which would, no doubt, cause another panic attack. But then, Remy spoke against, voice calm and clear, "So, you do feel the same way I do? You want to be in a romantic relationship?"

Virgil nodded, appreciative of the clear, curt question. Remy frowned a little, continuing, "Alright, so, if you feel the same way as me, can I ask why you panicked so much on Wednesday? I assumed it was because you were worried about me pushing for a relationship, or something similar, but that doesn't seem to be it." It was silent for a few moments before Remy continued, "You don't have too if you don't want to pumpkin! We can talk about something else."

Virgil shrugged, attempting to act nonchalant, "It's fine... the short story is that, well, I was in a relationship once... it didn't end well... or start well... it really wasn't... good." Virgil winced at how vague he sounded.

"I'm sorry, V." Remy said, frowning, "That fucking sucks."

Virgil shrugged once more, hands pulling at his hoodie strings, "'s fine. I just... when you said... you know," Virgil blushed, looking away from Remy, "I panicked. It really wasn't you. It was just... the situation, I guess."

Remy still looked slightly unsure, but nodded muttering an, "that's okay, hun" before moving on. "So," he stated, looking at Virgil, "Would you like to be my boyfriend? Or would you want to stay as friends? Because we can do whatever you feel comfortable with honey! We could also just wait and—"

"Remy." Virgil interrupted with a half smile, huffing, "Calm down. Panicking is my thing, remember?" Remy rolled his eyes, flipping Virgil off. In response, Virgil stuck his tongue out. Both of them smiled, looking at each other. Virgil blushed when Remy smiled at him, a smile of his own creeping on his face. "I would love to be your boyfriend," Virgil said suddenly, surprising Remy, "Right now. I mean, not this exact moment, but like starting today..." Virgil refused to look Remy in the eye, blushing madly.

"Vee?" Remy said softly and fuck Virgil couldn't just not look at him after Remy said his name like that. Virgil was startled when he saw the sheer amount of adoration on Remy's face, all for him. Virgil nearly cried. "I would love to be your boyfriend, starting right now."

"Oh," Virgil said, laughing a bit, "Okay." It was silent for a few more moments before Virgil felt the awkwardness begin to sink in, "Um," he started, clearing his throat, "What do we do now?" He asked uncertainly.

Remy laughed a little bit, smiling at the boy across from him. "You," he started, bumping a finger against Virgil's nose, "can fill this out," Remy said, once again sliding the open notebook to Virgil, "And I," Remy smiled, grabbing his backpack, "Can finish my godforsaken English homework." Virgil laughed, but remained confused; this was no different than what they would do before all of this.... was Remy just attempting to not overwhelm Virgil? After a moment of blankly staring at the notebook, however, Remy slowly grabbed Virgil's hand in his, not looking away from his work. "Oh" Virgil thought "Oh!" Virgil blushed but didn't move his hand. "This is nice," Virgil decided, jotting down his triggers into the notebook, focusing on the feeling of Remy's hand in his, "I could get used to this."

This one is short but sweet. Thanks for reading!!!
-Apollo