More venting tw: abuse

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My sister keeps hitting for singing I can't not sing singing is how I vent. My thoughts are getting scary again I can't go back to that place. I've started scratching again I went so long clean because I could vent sing but I'm so scared I'll get hit again. I'm too scared to tell my parents because they just tell me that I deserve it! I can't be in this house anymore! I need to go back to school I'm trapped here! I can't tell anyone if I do I'll get taken away from my parents and my dad will hate me! He keeps telling me that if I tell anyone how I've been feeling I'll get taken  away and I'll get abused or worse! So I fake smile and only cry at night when I'm safe. God I wish someone would see that I'm not okay! But it doesn't count as abuse because I'm only getting hit by my sister and she's my sibling and that's what siblings do! My dad tells me that I'm not Worth shit and that I'm a idiot and a crybaby I'm so done with live

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