Life and I

Dear Me, Those days were good!

February 14, 2019.
Dear Me,

I am currently eating my once upon a time favorite biscuit, 'Cream crackers' and my disappointment cannot be explained. This biscuit is now unlike what it used to be.

If 'a shadow of its former self' can be used for inanimate things, it is perfect for the description of this biscuit. Same goes Ovaltine, Noodles, Gala, Cheeseballs and one thousand once upon a time yummy yummies.
I wish I could remember more, but the human mind is projected to remember few things at a time, sometimes, especially when you really need to remember more than a few. Then much later when the need for the things one was trying to remember has gone, the mind brings it up and one goes: "Oh. Yes, and you too. I tried remembering you. Why didn't I?
So I might start to remember more past yummies next week.

Human mind, well-done.

Today is lovers day and my single self is here sitting in my room writing in you and surfing through the internet.
The internet is not a great place for me to be in now because the lovers and couples are really rubbing my singleness in my face with their various love displays. Invented love, and genuine love alike.

My roommates are not in the room with me. They have gone to love up their boyfriends in the school's popular café; 'R Jon's', pronounced Regions. I often get frustrated at words that are not pronunced the way they're spelt/ written, like "Why don't you be what you are spelt as?! Why you gon spoil my head?".

Back to my singleness life, Today I wish I had a boyfriend. I was thinking to myself that if any boy at all had asked me out last night, I would have said yes. Just to not experience what I am now. On second thoughts I have spoken to myself on the need to not be stupid because every other person has someone to date (Yes every other person, more than half of this hostel's students are outside, with a boy by their sides, exchanging love words, and goodies.
And to get the best, I must watch out for the best. Wait, This makes so much sense, it could pass as a quote.

To get the best, You must watch out for the best. --Moradeun Aletor.
February 14, 2020. 2:00pm.

If I do succumb to my desire to have what nearly every one else has, I would be doing myself a whole lot of wrong, especially without thinking deeply and knowing much about the loverboy/ prospective boyfriend. Besides I need to think far into the relationship. Where would it lead us? Where will it be in years time?- A memory in R Jon's? In what ways and how would we be useful in each other's lives? What would I think about some attitudes?- what if he has that trait/ attitude/ emotional problem I so much hate in people; Anger and brash expressions of anger, for instance resorting to violence? What if the love is a sham? My overthinking self would need much more than a baseless relationship that would take us nowhere but on kissing, smooching, and bleh sprees. A relationship based on God. A reasonable relationship.

Really those days were good. The good old days!.
Then life was straight. There was no pressure have this new generation's must haves.
The need to have boyfriends that can provide it all, like small daddies that they are. The need to have boyfriends that can show love everyday, like love gods that they are. The need to have boyfriends that would show what marriage could be like, like the knowers that they are.

On the other side, I know I'm going to be stuffed from the goodies my roomies bring from their boyfriends. Hahaha. So much for not having a boyfriend. (I'm silly).

I'm off buy myself shawarma, I'm in love with myself, I will show me some love.

I'm my own lover.
I'm my own sweetheart.
I'm my own honey.
I'm my own love.
I'm my own darling.
I'm my own self, who knows herself.

I love me. I love shawarma, it is the love of my life (the original and unfailing yummy of the yummies). So I'm going to show my love to my love through my love.

Chuckles.

I can't sit down all day like something I don't understand.

Talk to you later, dear Me.
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❤❤❤
Keep reading sweeties.

•744 words.