Middle

Hope

The unpleasant sound is still ringing in my head . Panicking and sobbing was the only thing that I was doing .
Thinking that Henry was about to ...
It turned out that the sound came his mother's machine .
His dad's face fell and he started yelling for the nurses and doctors .
His eyes were  holding  an ocean of emotions .
Love , regret , fear ....
The whole situation is scray , what if she didn't make it .
'Shut up' a voice in my head screamed .
Dad looked shocked , he hugged me and begged me to go outside the room but I refused for an unknown reason .
It didn't want leave him alone .
Ethan ran outside to bring help ,even though Henry's dad yelled .
"Please I need all of you to get out" a nurse said .
We all did .
I was still crying , still shocked , sad .
I wish that nothing of this happened .
I wish that I never existed to see and live all this pain .
I wish that my mind shuts down and stops giving me negative crape that I don't need .
As soon as I was thinking , I saw  two familiar women running towards us .
My mama and aunt.
Their faces were pale .
I felt dad hugging me and telling me "have hope Summer , they are both fighters and they will get through it".
I really needed to hear those words , to hear the word hope that I forgot .
Praying and crying silently is all I can do .
The poor man was standing over there , his face in his hands .
I can see he is crying , he is shaking .
He needs someone to tell him the same exact words that baba said a while ago .
Leaving Baba's embrace I went to him, giving a half side hug telling him that she will make it , she is a fighter .
That everything is happening is just a test from God , he is quizing our own strength .
He looked at me , his eyes were red .
His face was red and I can see that how much he is broken .
He hugged me and thanked me .
Then the doctor came out and everyone ran towards him asking about them .
" They are both fine , and it is normal that her heart was beating fast since she got into a very bad accident .It is a mirical that they both survived .God loves them "the doctor said while giving us a reasurring smile .
We all sighed in relief , and I can see that mama ,baba and my aunt were smiling and thanking God.
Ethan then came to us , I think he went to his mother and talked to her .
" what happend ?"
"They are both fine and it is a normal thing to happen you know the doctor explained ".
Ethan was starring at me now , as if he is reading my mind .
Well this is creepy ...
After this weird moment , we sat on the chairs .
I hate hospital chairs , they aren't comfortable at all .
All they can do is make you back sore , hurt you name it .
I hate hospitals in general .
One hour passed and my parents wanted to go to the house .
They made sure that Stephen , Henry's dad  doesn't need anything and everything is fine .
Saying good bye to him and Ethane ,we went to the car .
The radio was on , the car ride was peaceful .
I feel a little bit better .
Baba took us to the beach , which is the best thing that ever happened today .
Ordering an ice cream and feeling the sand calmed me .
I wish that Henry was here with me , eating with me and saying bad jokes that made me crack .
I  really need to give myself a break from thinking , a lot has been going on , from school to ...many other things .
I saw mama and baba sitting far away from me , talking with each other .The site of seeing them made me feel safe , happy .
I am so glad that my parents understand me , help me getting through hard times .
Looking at the water that is touching my feet , I saw shells which made me smile .
I picked them up and put the big one on my ear , I heard noises that seemed like a music to my ear , I felt relaxed .
After eating my ice cream and chilling over an hour , I went back to the car .
After the long drive , we reached our house .
I ran upstairs and sat on the bed , thinking about if I am going to school tomorrow . I have to go to school , I don't want to miss anything .
I just packed the bag and checked if there is any homework I have to do .
I took a warm shower , said good night to everyone and drifte to sleep .
...............................
Holy moly , first of all I hate school .
Second of all I hate school .
Third of all I hate people and ...school.
So nothing new , I went to hell and got back home .
This is the first day without Henry , it was ...disturbing . The whole day I was cursing under my breath . I didn't sleep well , my eyes were red from crying and not sleep well.
But Ethan made everything a little bit easier .
And not to mention , the bus is an another level of hell .
Kids were fighting over a piece of fucking candy , and two girls were killing each other over a boy .
And I was sitting there trying to scoop anyone's eyeballs or slitting their throats .
But thank God that I am in my house eating with parents since my siblings are at work .
I was thinking about visiting Henry but I need to talk with baba about it ,because he is the one who will drive me there .
If he agreed I will call Ethan telling him I will go visit him and his mom .
Probably Ethan is there before me and actually I don't want to go alone just with baba. I need someone else with me like Ethan .
I hope he will say yes .
Wish me luck .