The Khuzwayo's

Insert 17:

Yanela
The school was so huge. I got out of my last orientation and took the books and flyers and stuffed them in my book. I walked out to the parking lot and sat under a tree and texted Thulane that am done he called.
Me: Hi
Thulane: where are you?
Me: Am at the parking lot under the big oak tree
Thulane: okay give me 5 minutes ill be there. I disconnected the call and chill and than there was someone blocking the light. I looked up and saw a tall slim guy wearing a black jacket. I stood up and looked at him as he looked at me as if he recognises me.
Him: oh sorry I thought you someone else. He moved away and disappeared in the crowd making me feel uneasy. I stood there feeling vulnerable and having that uneasy feeling as if someone watching me. I took my bag quickly and went to the bathroom. I sat on the toilet seat and text Thulane.
𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐟𝐚𝐫 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮?
𝐡𝐢𝐦: 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐥𝐨𝐭 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐛𝐲 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐭𝐫𝐞𝐞.
𝐦𝐞: 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐠.
I walked out and almost ran to the car.

Thulane
I stood there and I watched her as she walks quickly to me. When she reached me she threw herself in my hands and I hugged her. We got in the car and she looked out the window and I could sense that she was crying but didn't want me to know. I drove to my place instead and we got home. She walked in and threw her bag on the floor than sat on the couch taking the fleece blanket and covering herself. I went to her and picked her up going up the stairs to my room. I placed her in bed and cuddled as she cried breaking my heart as her tears went through to my chest. I kept quiet as I held her.
Yanela: I come from a broken home. Since the first day I was born till just a few days ago were Iv been so happy more than words could explain that how much you have made me happy and believe in hope. She shifted and I brushed her back. " when I was born, we were three. We were just girls and my mom says she was the happiest ever. I still have my memories of my sisters like it was yesterday but because my father was a cruel man. Little did my mother know that life will be just a nightmare. My father tolerated my sisters and I but i guess he liked me more since I was the odd one out and the other two were identical" she moved a bit and I allowed her to be as comfortable as she could. She wrapped half her lower body on me making me smile. " at 2 years my father left with my sister and she never came back. It was just us two. My sister was my best friend since we were not allowed to go out or have friends. Dad feared we will talk or someone might see something is amiss and report him. Anyways when I was 10 my father started touching me inappropriately and I kept quiet but my sister Yoniswa saw that sometimes I wasn't myself and those were the days that my father will come brush my body or make me strip naked as he played with himself. So Yoniswa cornered me one day and I told her what happens when they sleeping. My sister who was just 3 minutes older than me thought it was best to fight my battle and went and told mom who was shocked and she confronted dad that when he started beating her. He said you love your bitches more than me" her voice became wobbly. I kept quiet sensing that she needed to let this out. Whatever terrified her today is making her relieve this night mare. After a few breaths she collected herself. " my mom took it and not once did she ever go to the police or told a soul about her abuse. We saw it cause we were there. My sister Yoniswa was molested by my father more times than I could remember and you know what she used to say when I used to comfort her or bathe her when he was to rough on her. She will say " I rather he does it to me than break your soul. I can take it and live with it but you, it will break you" those words used to break me but she would smile and tell me we will be okay. She lived that life for 3 years than he sold her to some Nigerian man. I heard my mother fight him and I swear I thought ill lose her too that day because he beat her to the pulp. My sister died a few years later with her womb taken out of her body and that broke me beyond words. I hated my father with all of me and yet I was powerless. If I ran my mother will pay. If I stayed than am waiting for what he has in store for me. When my mother will break one of his rules he will drag me to his car with me screaming and my mom begging him to let me go and put me in the boot and drive off in a speed. We will drive for hours. At first it never made sense and Than it hit me that he was breaking our souls. He was breaking mines in making me fear the unknown and he was breaking my mothers in letting her relive the possibility of never seeing me again" she got up and looked at me with tears streaming down her eyes and I stared back at her.
Yanela: " Am not telling you this because I want you to feel sorry for me or I want you to do something or I want something from you. Am telling you this because I dont understand how come I feel so safe with you. After everything Iv been through, after how many times iv vowed to never be close to a man in my life. After how I told myself that I should never trust a man yet here I am finding Solace in your arms, in your words and mostly in your home. Iv tried to block it out, all the feelings that iv been feeling for you. In 3 days you have showed me so much care and love. Something that I never thought I could ever accept from a man. I find myself thinking of all that you have done for a stranger. And am wowed my mind cannot wrap itself on it." I wiped the tear that was rolling down her face and looked and cradled her face in my hands.
Me: My mom always say people give you energy signals. You should learn to read the energy and aura surrounding them than what they face or body and eyes are telling you cause those features can be easily manipulated. Your aura was peace. Your energy was screaming for help. As much as your body language was giving another message but those two told a story. They told a story of a woman whom ill like to help. A woman that I never knew that in helping am also helping myself healing.Cause I never knew how lonely my life was and how much I needed You specifically in my life. Iv been thinking that ever since we have been apart, you all that Iv been thinking about and you all that I want and need. We stared at each other for a long time.
Yanela: Am so broken that I don't even know how to love. Am afraid ill hurt you or I wouldn't love you the way you would love me. Am even afraid that the feelings I might have for you are not love but gratitude for all you have done. They is an inner fight within me and I don't know what is anymore.
Me: We not rushing it. We will explore everything that you feel or might go through together. The most important part is I have you and you have me. That all that matters right now. She looked at me shyly and smiled wiping her tears.
Yanela: I never prayed for this but I like it. She giggled a girlish laugh. I laughed out loud
Me: When I lost my sister my mother told me: God makes plans while we pray for something else he makes plans for something totally different and unexpected. I guess she was talking about you coming into my life and now being my life. She looked at me with tears in her eyes.
Yanela: I pray he answers this prayer... I pray I never hurt you and I bring as much joy as you bring to me. I smiled at her as she moved closer to me and I snuggled her. She stayed in my arms as I listen to her breathing change deeper and I knew she was asleep. I didn't move and let my mind run wild in thoughts. Is this how it feels like to love a person? A person Iv only known for 3 days yet it feels like a lifetime. A person who now holds the strings of my mood. Am I dreaming or is he universe somehow playing a trick on me...