One Last Time

Chapter 16 | Sunset

Since yesterday, Ronnie's been staying with me to make sure I still have a pulse. I'm currently at the cafe close by the library that Ronnie often goes to. She demanded I should get some air while she cleans up my place. I brought with me one of my favorite books to read and ordered blueberry muffins with iced chocolate milk. It has been quiet during the time that has passed. I calmed down after trashing my house. In caution, Ronnie put away any fragile items away from my reach. I reassured her it won't happen again many times to no avail. Before I could read the next chapter of the story, my elbow accidentally pushed my phone off the edge of the table. I bent down to pick it up praying it hasn't cracked.

"One medium iced chocolate milk and a cranberry muffin, please."

That voice

In a panic state, I hurriedly pick up my book, making the effort to be unnoticed. I slouched, and tilted my head in order for my hair to hide majority of my face. I waited quietly as Reed paid for his order. What was he doing here out of all places? Last I checked, he didn't come to this place often. The times he did come here was because we had a double date with Ronnie or a pick up snack after work. Once the entrance door jingles, I relaxed believing he already left. I spoke too soon.

"Excuse me, can I have a minute of your time?"

I cursed under my breath at his twenty-twenty vision. I smiled politely, "Go ahead!" and gesture for hit to take a sit. He better make it quick. Reed gladly took the offer, clearly afraid he might miss his chance if he doesn't. He sighed in relief, "I didn't catch your name the last time I saw you. The doctor told me you were the one who brought me to the hospital." I hold Reed's gaze for what feels like an eternity. His hair has gotten longer and a stubble's growing.

He's wearing a plain baby blue v-neck shirt with a Calvin Klein watch on his left wrist. I don't dare wander my eyes any lower in fear that he'll notice I'm checking him out. I didn't expect him to remember me. Because he lost his memory, that could be considered as our first encounter. I also have been avoiding places we might encounter each other. Technically, I've been avoiding any chance for us to meet overall.

I blinked out of my daze, blushing. I quickly looked at my wrist and did a tsk, "Oh, bummer! Looks like your minute's up!" I begin gathering my things but Reed stops me before I could finish, "Wait, wait, wait! Please, hear me out. I wanted to thank you for saving me that day. If you hadn't found me, I would've been a goner."

"No problem! Just me being a good person, haha." I face-palmed myself for my awkward behavior. Reed doesn't mind, though. He chuckled and took bites from his muffin. "I actually found some notes back at my place with your name and information. It also said I started working at your library. Why'd you lie about not knowing each other?" Wow, I certainly didn't expect that! What else has he been doing at home? I quickly thought of an excuse, "Um, there was nothing serious that's worth mentioning. We were just colleagues. You wanted to busy yourself this summer so I let you work at The Salvator Library. You didn't plan on staying long anyway, so I let you go. The accident must've cause you a bit of stress and working would worsen it."

"Information like that still matters to me. A part of my life has been ripped away from me. I don't care how short it was. There was a part of me that felt something wasn't right. Like, I was missing an important event in my time here," he ended with a whisper. His grip on his drink tightens, frustration radiating off him. I observe his behavior, not knowing what to say. I hesitantly put my hand over his for comfort. "I'm sorry. I should've considered your feelings. What can I do to help?" I finally replied. I can't believe I agreed to help him.

He stared at our hands for a minute, "Since we're colleagues, I'm wondering if it's okay that we'd hang out tomorrow? I want to at least remember bits of what happened these last few months. At the same time, I'll treat you for it as a sign of my gratitude!" I'm not used to seeing another side of Reed that isn't playful or mischievous. Right now, He looks like a lost puppy which makes it harder for me to reject his offer. I know I shouldn't agree to it, but I can't help myself. Maybe there's still hope.

————

"I can't believe this happened! Like, what the hell?" Ronnie fumes while pacing back and forth in my living room, "I thought you're moving on from him, what gives? I mean, you quit your job as a counselor because of what happened with Liam. Aren't you gonna ask Reed to back off? I know there's no way you'll stop working at the library."

I frustratedly moan rolling on my stomach so I don't have to face Ronnie. She's been lecturing me nonstop since I got home. "You know how unpredictable this curse is! Anything could happen to you at any time if you don't control your emotions. God knows what's gonna happen if I don't control mine!" she added. I listen to her ramble for a bit until she began to shake.

"It's my life, Ronnie! I can handle myself. I can't hide away until I grow old and die alone. Isn't experiencing this type of thing part of living? Besides, I'm dealing with the consequences of my choices. Last time I felt this type of normal was more than five years ago with Liam. Things may have not ended well but at least I was able to live all through things I never expected myself to do in my life, ever." I reasoned. I felt exhausted avoiding situations involving a significant other, especially since I've been doing it for so long. I'm only human.

Ronnie's lips quivered, "I love you, Maya. Am I not good enough? Isn't our friendship good enough? I can't lose my best friend. You're like the sister I always wanted. I don't want you gone." Her eyes brimming with tears. It brings back the picture of what happened after my breakdown. Although I was in and out of consciousness, I heard her heartbreakingly sob in my bathroom. "Oh, Ronnie. I love you too, but this is different. I love our friendship and I love that you've become my family. You've been there for me from high school, the death of my parents, and even now. But this isn't the love I've been craving through the years. One I've been deprived of," I explained to her.

Ronnie turns away from me and stays silent. I understand why she's behaving like this. I face the window and admire the tranquility of the sunset. It's glimmering light reflects the sky with clouds tinted in a mixture of pink and purple. I asked her one last thing before today comes to its bittersweet end.

"Have you felt it before? A stranger, someone who isn't a part of your family or a friend you grew up with, found it within themselves to love you entirely on their own. I wish I did, but unfortunately I don't think it's in my fate for me to have it," I sighed.

Sorry I couldn't keep my promise, mom.