Moment to moment

-7-

Morning came and it's like the previous night never happened. Just as usual, we pack our things and set out. But unlike the usual, I felt this twinge, like I'm missing something. Of course there's a lot of holes and vanished pieces in my life, but today it felt different.

By now we were hiking up a cliff, the sea roaring not so far below us. Up ahead, a rope swing dangles from a huge tree off the cliff, swaying slightly in the breeze.

"Let's do that." I say without thinking.

"What?"

I incline my head towards the precarious rope,"Let's try it."

He looks completely bewildered,"Are you out of your mind."

"Quite possibly." As I strip away my bag along with my boots and socks, he watches me in stunned silence.

"But what the—"

I give him a 'do you really wanna try me' look,"I need to do something a little fun and reckless before we get sick, ganged, or have to figure our way out of an impossible situation."

He shuts his mouth but follows me with a vicious glare.

Getting to the tree, I pull on the rope to test it's durability. The branches groan but hold. I stick my foot in the loop and grab onto it.

Looking back, all I see is Kyle's menacing scowl.

"Stop looking at me like I'm gonna drop dead."

He crosses his arms,"That might very well be the case."

I don't even try to disguise my eye roll and turn back to the fraying piece of shit.

"Here goes nothing."

I push off, the branches give a frightening creak and small twigs snap. Then I get this sensation of falling? No, flying. In one magnificent swoop, I can taste the salty air, feel the wind at my back, and a brief, wonderful lightness. It's only seconds and then I come back around, landing with a hard thump in the grass.

"See, not so bad." I breath.

He just shakes his head,"What has gotten into you today?"

"What? You're not gonna try it?" I pout.

"You've got a death wish, not me."

I study the rope again,"Time for round two."

But before I can go, I feel a hand at my elbow,"I think that's enough for today."

I jerk away,"I should be allowed to be dumb once in awhile, I'm only 17."

The weight of that is so heavy. I really went through a global pandemic at 15 that nearly wiped out half the U. S. and the rest of the world. The biggest hurricane in history along with many other natural disasters, loses, and running away on my own at 16. And practically a zombie apocalypse that destroyed another portion of the world before my birthday turning 17.

But I refuse to let that get in the way of a few seconds of fun.

With a hand braced on the firm bark, I let a smile spread across my face. My stomach turns with the excitement. Call me childish, or dumb, but after so many years of darkness and dread, this felt so freeing.

I push off, reaching towards the horizon.

Peace. Freedom.