Clarity

Chapter 4

Flashback

It was the last night of VidCon. All the YouTubers that had attended were sharing laughs and just enjoying the after party. Alcohol was obviously involved, some were a little more intoxicated than others. Joe and Caspar fell into that category of people that had one drink too many.

The music was blasting and everyone was having a good time. The two boys begun to get a little handsy and before they knew it, they were full on grinding on each other, everyone chanting "Jaspar".

Before the night was over, they had managed to sneak out of the party without anyone noticing. They stumbled back to their hotel, laughing and slurring the whole way. Luckily the hotel wasn't far.

Caspar walked Joe to his room. He was just about to leave, but Joe grabbed his face and slammed his lips into Caspars. He was a little caught of guard, but immediately kissed back.

Caspar pushed open the door, lifting Joe up on his hips without breaking the kiss. They made their way to the bed, lips still locked. Joes legs wrapped around Casper's waist, fingers ruffling through his hair.

Caspar lay Joe on the bed, hovering over him. He pulled his shirt over his head, throwing it on the ground and unbuttoning his pants, "I'm gonna make you scream so loud tonight, Sugg."

Joe giggled, "Just shut up and fuck me."

End of Flashback
-

2 Months Later

Joe had been sick for a few weeks now. He tried to pass it off as just the virus, but he knew it was more than that. He tried hiding his symptoms as best he could, especially from Caspar and Zoe, because he did not want to worry them.

Joe knew he was "special", or so his mother liked to say, but what did that mean? Joe some what of an idea, finally mustering up the courage to face the reality, he went to the store to buy a pregnancy test.

Even though no one would know he was buying it for himself, he still ashamed to be buying such a thing. He even wore his hood over his head and a pair of sunglasses to hide his face.

-

Joe hide the brown paper bag under his hoodie, as he unlocked the door. Caspar was laid out on the couch, shirtless, in his pajama pants playing FIFA. Joe bit his lip. He closed the door as silently as he could, he cringed as it squeaked. Caspar paused his game and turned his head, "Joe! Where'd you go?" He smiled.

"I uh, j-just to the store," he stuttered. Joe walked to the stairs, trying just to escape the awkward conversation. He didn't even want to look at Caspar at this point.

"What did you need at the store?" Caspar continued on.

"Don't worry about it," Joe replied, Caspar frowned. Joe didn't look him in the eyes, he just continued down the stairs as quick as he could to his room, locking the door. He then did the same with the bathroom door, taking out the box from the brown bag. He sat on the toilet, opening the box slowly, taking out the tests. He sighed, "Just do it, Joe."

-

Joe was pacing across the floor. The five minutes were up. He didn't even want to know. After a few minutes he finally brought himself to do it. He walked in the bathroom. Three tests sat on the counter, flipped over so he couldn't see the results. He flipped over the first one, positive.

Tears began to blur his vision. "This can't be right," he thought. He flipped over the next one, positive, and the next one, positive as well.

He slumped down down the wall, head in his hands. He pulled at his hair as he sobbed. He was scared, hell, he was terrified but he knew he had to go through with this. It was his baby. It was his and Casper's baby, the one they made together.

Upstairs, Caspar was still on the couch, playing FIFA. He had no idea that his best friend had just found out he was pregnant. A guy pregnant with his baby. He hadn't even really thought about having kids yet, he was 20 years old for fucks sake, Joe only 23. Their careers just starting out, Joe knew this was the end of his. There was no way he was going to admit to the world that he was pregnant male. He loved his fans, but he knew they wouldn't understand. Many of them would judge him, hate him, hate his baby, and he didn't want to face that.

-

I'm so sorry that I haven't updated recently but I've just been super busy! This chapter was kind of stupid but I just kinda wanted to throw in a flashback.

I hope you all had a great Christmas! And for those who didn't know, yesterday was the 100th Sugg Sunday. I'm so proud of Joe you don't even know, he and so many others are what help me get through the week.

Oh and also, yesterday was Jim Chapman and Nash Griers birthday so happy birthday to them!

Song: Gasoline by Troye Sivan

I know it doesn't really go with the chapter, I wanted to use Teenage Dream by Katy Perry but I decided to use it in a later chapter.