Help(ed) (a readerxavengers)

Chapter 6

We let my room and where at the front door, I was finally leaving. I was going to have a home, a dad, a family. I stood and looked at the house from inside, all the physical and mental pain these bastards have caused me. The insecurities being soar the day after being beat up, and stress. it was all finally being lifted off my back. I let out a small scoff, a big smiled plastered on my face as I looked at my ex-peers and Madam Blue. They put me through misery and pain, but they can't anymore. They can't hurt me anymore.  I tried to say bye, but when my mouth opened that's not what came out. 

"see you in hell." I said 

I jumped at what I had said, Then immediately covered my mouth and fear and embarrassment filled not only my face but my entire body. I looked up to Tony, who had a knuckle over his mouth and the rest of his hand on his chin, trying his hardest not to laugh. I loosened up, knowing I was safe and okay. No one could do anything to me that wouldn't be punished. When I had looked back, One of the girls was stopping the other from running over to hit me,but she had let go over her. She ran at me, with angry eyes and screamed as she ran from across the room.  "okay." tony said uncomfortably as he put my arms out in a "T" pose and picked me up by my arms and swung me around his back. 

The girl had ran, straight forward and punched tony in the stomach. Tony got a look of pain in his scrunched up face, his eyes closed tightly. "OH MY GOD MR STARK I AM SO SORRY!" the girl shouted covering her moth and beginning to cry. Tony still has his eyes shut tightly and nodded his head, acknowledging her apology, then turning his head to the right to talk to me on his back. "you want to say anything else before we go?" he asked in a somehow still patient and kind voice even through the previous events. "n-no." I whispered embarrassed, he turned and looked at everyone and put his hand up and a gesture of saying goodbye. Every girl waved sadly and Madam Blue in shock. He turned with me still handing from his shoulders like a piggy back ride and opened to door to cameras and flashing lights. Ah, the glorious paparazzi. 

"sorry kiddo. something you may need to get use to." he chuckled. I let out a soft laugh as people where screaming stuff at tony and me. He had the self control to ignore very question, truly impressive. "MR STARK! WHATS HER NAME?!" "MR STARK HOW OLD IS SHE?!" "WAS THIS FOR A FUNDRAISER?!" "ARE YOU HAPPY?!" I heard those questions asked, but the entire time I continued to look at the back of Tony's head to distract myself. We got to the end of the driveway where there was a pretty Black BMW,  a large man with short curly hair greeted the both of us and opened the door for us to go in. "Mr Stark." the man smiled and nodded "Happy! This is Winnie. Winnie this is happy, he's my assistant." Tony said smiling "its a pleasure to meet you Ms. Winnie!" the man said then shook my small hand "hi happy." I said some what shyly.

Tony helped me off his back and allowed me to go in the car before him. once we where all adjusted Happy drove us away and the both of them took a deep breath. "Sorry about that kid. that's going to be everywhere we go." Tony said shrugging his shoulders then Chuckling. My response was just a smile and a nod looking down. "so kid, you sure you're 15? " he asked me looking at me curiously. "As sure as I can be." I said giving him a confident smile, "because your tiny kid." He said then letting out a laugh. How could he possibly think I was small? What part of me was small? Not my feet, not my legs, stomach, arms, chin, cheeks, nothing! 

"*quiet sarcastic scoff* yea... I am... hehhe..." I said awkwardly, I didn't intend for it to sound they way It did. Like I disagreed, or annoyed by what he had said.

"hey its okay, I'm small too." he said then pulled up his dress pants a tad to reveal he was wearing boots that made 4" taller then he was. I giggled loudly and a big, amused, real smile plastered on my face. He seemed to smile even bigger at he fact he made me smile, In that moment I thought Maybe I can find love for myself, not only from someone else, but from myself. But those thoughts only last for so long.

He's nice. you don't deserve him.   shit. no I can't have a breakdown, or a panic attack. not here, not now, not in front of my new dad!

  "Fear is among the most powerful of all emotions. And since emotions are far more powerful than thoughts, fear can overcome even the strongest parts of our intelligence."

I looked down and bit the insides of my cheeks, I felt my gums break and I tasted bitter blood. I finally felt relived, I was no longer anxious now that I had distracted myself with the pain inside of my mouth. I was holding my fists tightly, my long thick sharp finger nails stabbing the inside of my fragile-skinned palm. 

I had completely spaced out, hearing that voice, who always had something awful to say. Tasting, the bitter blood that i caused myself to bleed out. Feeling the pain go through my hands from stabbing harder then i should. Looking down at my feet,being ashamed of myself. I was so awkward and shy, worthless and fat, you could probably smell it. And finally, I was snapped back.

"hey kiddo we're home, and don't do that to your hands, you'll hurt yourself." Tony said taking my hand and holding onto it.

"okay." I said nodding and turning my lips up a bit

See, he cares. He's the one who gives a shit about whether or not my HANDS hurt. He doesn't want me to feel that awful pain. I thought to the god damn voice in my head, thinking I really got it this time. But here's the thing, you will never win against the voice. It will always find something to judge you on, and make it seem like the worst thing ever no matter if it was true, false, or not a big deal in anyway shape or form.

He has to say that. You're just a charity deal and got lucky. he doesn't give a shit about you he just wants to look like a good dad whether he is one or not. don't get hope. hope is for suckers.

Check, and mate. Again, I lost to the voice in my head.

Hey! This was a longer chapter because it hit close to home and was an amazing vent. :) Thank you so so so much for all of the love it means so much and inspires me to continue to write these chapters! Now I have a question, Would you mind after Winnie gets introduced to the team and day at the compound I make a month or so of a time skip? I was thinking about doing that, but please let me know if you would disagree with that idea, I will truly keep your comments, recommendations, and kind words in mind while I write. <3