Dear My Devil

18 | the furthest

🎵 Losing me - Gabrielle Aplin, JP Cooper

= I'm scared to call you back, I'm not good at trying to tell you that I'm not doing okay. But I'm dying to hear you say: "just take a breath, love. You can break down, let your worst out, lose your temper, but you're not losing me". =

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"I said I missed you." I repeated myself, not knowing what had gotten to me. Must be the flu screwing up my mind. All of a sudden, I wanted him to know how much I liked him, so much so that I was on the verge of confessing the big three words.

Jongdae drew his chair even closer and took my hand in. "Do Hwan hyung was right," he looked down to it. "Your hands are ice cold. Are you not feeling well?"

He reached forward to touch my forehead and I was going to let him but a knock came from the door. This time, I was all ready to push Jongdae away in order not to get caught.

And my first quickest reaction was to slap his hand down. I was too flustered at that time to think but I soon felt guilty for my action. Let's just hope it didn't hurt his feelings. Jongdae being way more composed than me, stood up and took a step back in time to maintain a friendly distance from me.

"Hi, we're here for the recording!" Hera came in first, gleefully walking to my side with the other girls.

Phew that no one actually saw us being almost intimate.

"Take a seat, everyone. We'll start when Do Hwan comes back. He's the one in charge and I'm here to supervise." Jongdae replied to them calmly, as if nothing went on between us just a minute before.

...

We walked out of the studio when the recording was completely done. Everyone was happy with their results, except me. I couldn't stop frowning, and I couldn't get over the mistakes I made during my turn to record.

'You're a little nasal today, Jisoo. Can we try one more time?'

I recalled back to Jongdae asking me to record over and over. He sensed that I wasn't in my best condition and I was well aware of it too. Because of my flu, my voice wasn't doing me justice.

"Hey, it's not your fault. Don't be too hard on yourself." Hera came to my side.

"It's my fault for being sick," I muttered, really hating myself at the moment for being weak like that. This was not how I wanted my experience at training camp to be. This was not my best.

"Don't think too much about it. Focus on getting better. We ended early today so go have a good long sleep and recharge for tomorrow, okay?" She lightly pat my back. We called it a day and were just making our way out of Block A back to our dorms.

"GUYSss!"

Both of us turned to a familiar girl voice and found Lia running up to us. She came in between and hooked her arms over the both of us, squealing excitedly. "I missed you guys! Shall we go get supper together? We all ended early today! There's a tteokbokki stand just by the gates, Sohee said we're allowed to eat there!"

"I can," Hera raised her hand, then pointed at me. "She can't."

"What? Why? Are you still feeling sick?" Lia felt my forehead, and Jongdae briefly crossed my mind. "Oh my god, you are."

I moved away before she starts panicking at my temperature. "I'm okay, just need to sleep it off tonight."

"You've been saying that for the past two nights." Hera rolled her eyes and I genuinely laughed at that.