Cannes | H.S

Sunshine

Layla

We needed an escape. We needed to leave behind the cold and dreary winter and find the warming rays of that golden sun. I desperately needed to revive the man of my dreams, finding the will to bring him back to me. It's as if we've been stuck in a twilight zone filled with darkness and grey. It's as if we've been stuck underneath the persuasion of a mighty wave as it craves to bring us further and further down until we're actually drowning under water. And as my fire begins to burn out, I fear I may never catch a glimpse of the shining rainbow that forever promised to stand by my side.

The media and lies have taken their toxic toll on him. He hasn't slept for weeks, gaining only a few hours here and there to shut out the constant noise from his ears. They're hungry for more news, wanting to hear us speak, yet we remain silent. For I'll never forget holding him in my arms as he awoke from a sudden sweat, shivering, pleading for my forgiveness. I despise seeing him so broken; shattered into a million puzzle pieces as I struggle to place him back together. I'll never forget the range of tears falling down his face as he told me of that ill fated night.

"Layla, I was so stupid. I wasn't thinking. We were both drinking and she looked so pretty. I didn't stop...I couldn't stop myself," he admits, failing to meet my eyes.

"Hey, please, stop apologizing to me. This was before we met. You did nothing wrong."

"Then why do I feel so guilty?"

"Because she's hurting you right now."

"And you're not upset with me?"

"No."

"Tell me the truth Layla."

"I'm not upset with you Harry, why would I be?"

He removes himself from me, breaking my heart once more in the process as his anger rises. "I feel like I'm going to lose you. This is exactly what she wants..."

"You're not going to lose me."

He shakes his head, ignoring my requests to look me in the eyes. "I'm not who they want me to be. I would never do what they think."

The tears aimlessly stream down his face like a bittersweet waterfall and I seem to be without the power to control it. I want to heal him, to save him, to stop the pain he's currently feeling at this very moment. I press my lips to the side of his face, hoping my reassuring touch would bring him closer as I see the agony flashing constantly within his eyes. He can't bring himself to truly look at me, fearing rejection, fearing I may turn him away.

"I know that, you don't have to convince me." When he attempts to walk off, I take his hand in my own, bringing him to a sudden stop. "I know you Harry, I know you would never hurt me."

"I didn't...I wouldn't..."

"I know Harry, I know..."

"Why is she doing this to me? Why won't she let me be happy? After all this time..."

"Harry, baby, please stop crying. I'm begging you, please stop crying. You're scaring me," I admit, witnessing the frantic way he continues to shake as I sit alongside the edge of the bed, desperately holding onto his hands for support. However, the moment he falls to his knees upon the carpet, he's in my arms as I whisper time and time again that everything is going to be alright.

"I don't want to lose you," he continues to repeat, the sobs poorly released as they get stuck in his throat with each word.

"I'm right here, I'm right here Harry..."