Unawnsered Questions - Soudam Fic ⚠

3| my mind is full

I look at my surroundings and lock the bathroom door. The bathroom has a window but im on the second floor with a sleeping sonia. What am i supposed to do.. I have to make this quick..
Outside of the window there's bushes and someone i didn't expect. Gundam tanaka. Ice prince.

"WHAT ARE YOU STILL DOING HER-" i yelp until gundam held one finger to his own mouth to motion i should shut up. He opened his arms and spoke loud enough for me to hear. "Ill catch her."
"Are you crazy!? She's asleep! And im on the second floor im going to get filed for murder if she dies right now!?"
Despite my complaints he keeps his arms held out for sonia. Gosh. Am i really going to throw sonia out a window?  Am i really going to trust gundam of all people? He's trying to steal the only love of my life i have if i do this.. But i have to get out of here as well.. I sigh and finally open the window more to fit sonia in it and with fear in my heart i toss sonia down to gundam, him catching her like he said he would.

Now its my turn. I heard footsteps coming to the second floor so i panicked and jumped out the window with no warning for me or gundam. Thank GOD he caught me anyways. But i looked down on him. He caught me but fell down in the grass. Me being ontop of him and making eye contact.
I dont know what to think anymore. My mind is going blank, my thoughts and all of my senses are focusing on gundam. I can't tell if this is just my drunk thoughts. He smells like pumpkins. His body feels warm against me. We're not breaking eye contact but gundam had to say something.

"K-kazuichi.." He trailed off and glanced away. Knowing that we should move. This isn't our place. Its ibukis. I instantly got off and gave sonia a piggyback ride. She seemed to be waking up a bit. "M-mmn.." She whimpered and layed her head on my shoulder. Making me tense up.
"So..whats the plan.." I started to walk down the sidewalk with gundam to who knows where, my walking motion being a bit weird from being a bit drunken.

"I-i dont know.. We can't just bring a drunk sonia back home and leave her there.." He fumbled with his scarf and continues. "I can let her stay the night at my plac-" i quickly interrupted his thought "n-no you're not doing that! I dont trust you stealing her from me!" "She isn't mine kazuichi..neither yours.."
"Wh-whatever.. How about i stay at your place too? I dont trust you alone with her."
Gundam let out a soft smile "i feel the need to take care of you too anyways.. I sensed the smell of achohol from your mouth."
I couldn't tell if he was making fun of me so i let out a complaint "god dammit sometimes you make me forget that im supposed to hate you!"

"I wish you wouldn't hate me.." He mumbled as we turn another direction to walk. "M-mn.." Sonia let out another grunt and her grip on me got tighter. "Hey sleepyhead..~" i forced out a flirt to sonia as she woke up. But she only replied in whimpers and movements.

"I love you sonia..~" i forced that hard sentence out of my throat just to get a reaction out of gundam. I shared a short glance with him. His eyes were dropped down and with a frown upon his face. when we made eye contact he lookrd away sadly, filling me with sudden guilt and regret.

Sonia whimpered in response to my confession. I'll never know what her feelings are. And if they're real or not because of her drunken state. And im..okay with that.. I don't want to know.. My feelings toward sonia are complicated.. I love her.. Atleast thats the thought i force onto myself.. I know she's out of my league. Thats the whole point of this crush. Her insults validate me.

"You're a pig"

"You're disgusting"

"You're perverted"

"You're worthless"

I know i am miss sonia.
I know.
And i..

I love that you tell me that the things that i say to myself is true.