DESIRE

Truth (2)

Lahel Pov

"Anything?" The creature asked.

I could almost hear him smirking.

"Please. Please."

Down on the floor on my hands and knees, I bowed down deeply, placing my head on the cold stone ground. And as luck would have it, he accepted my begs.

"Then out of respect for your bottomless stupidity, let us conduct a special test. If you can bring his life to a close, I will allow you to climb the Tower."

"What?"

"You must end Baam's story with your own hands."

"You mean... you want me to kill Baam?"

"Why are you surprised? You don't need him anymore. You abandoned him. And thanks to that, he's brought an even more dangerous monster into the Tower."

"I..."

"Only you can decide."

"Give me a weapon. Baam has an incredible weapon and a Demon princess as an ally. It's not fair!!" I argued.

The creature snickered to himself, bearing his sharp shark-like teeth into view.

"I don't dislike your shallow thinking. He is your bodyguard. Your gatekeeper to Hell. Just once, you will be resurrected."

The creature explained to me what the large, baboon-like man's purpose was. In the case of a deadly attack, it would take the damage for itself and disappear. I would be unharmed.

So I trusted his words and participated in the Crown Game.

"it's okay for me to kill all of them, right?" Androssi asked.

"Yes. Of course."

I wished... for someone to kill Baam. After all, I couldn't kill him. I didn't understand why he would protect me. Why he had been gifted with such an amazing talent for Shinsu control. Why he had everything that I wanted. Why? Why would you protect me? Why would you save me?

Don't. After all... I have to kill you.

I can't let him look at me anymore.

"You want me to lie to Baam? That you're not Lahel? Even though he wants to be with you?" Koon asked.

"Yes. We can't be together." I replied.

I needed to distance myself and look for an opportunity. At least, that's what I intended. But my body wouldn't listen to me. As I sat in bed every night, holding the knife in my hands, wishing to be able to somehow gain the courage to kill Baam, time continued to pass.

Before I knew it, I was terrified of spending points.

What if I can't kill Baam? I can't climb the Tower with the points I have now.

Why?

He keeps getting everything I want.

Cecelia has everything, and yet, she keeps taking, and taking, and taking more. More and more and more. She was already promised to an entire Kingdom, after being born with a golden spoon in her hands. She was a powerful princess from birth, destined for everything and anything that she wished for. And yet...

She kept getting more- just like Baam.

If I were to make her into my ally, would I be able to get everything like them?

"I hope that whatever you're seeking at the top of the Tower is worth more than him," Androssi commented.

It's always Baam, Baam, Baam.

"Who does she think she is?" I muttered to myself.

But can I do it? I can't, can I?

Knowing that I couldn't accomplish the feat by myself, I followed orders of that red-haired girl. Hwa Ryun. It was almost amusing how everything went according to plan. As long as I did what she said, and made sure to not anger Cecelia... the chance to kill Baam would come. I just had to wait for it. It was that simple.

But another part of me wanted Baam to run.

I wanted him to run so that I wouldn't be able to kill him.

Unlike what Baam told me, I wasn't a light, no matter how much you looked at it. I'm too black and muddy, after all. Your words touched nothing in me. My feelings about the Tower can't be suppressed.

I was so jealous of you, that it drove me mad.

I hated you.

When you walked out of the room having finished the Administrator's Test, I knew. That was was nowhere to run now. I have to do it. but when I talked with you inside the Shinsu bubble within the lake, a small thought went through my mind. That there may be a way for me to climb the Tower with you.

Baam, you look at me so intently.

You're the only one that treats me like I'm special.

"When the Administrator asked me what I wanted from the Tower, the first thing I saw was you and Cecelia. Then the next thing that came to my mind was the cafeteria." He had told me.

That's when I realized.

"You're amazing, Baam," I muttered to myself.

No. You knew, but you averted your gaze because you didn't want to admit it.

It was Baam who became a star, not me.

~~~ /// ~~~ \\\ ~~~

Wants to become special, but doesn't have the guts to do what it takes to become "special".

2.4 pages, 849 words