ー ℍ𝕒𝕓𝕣𝕠𝕞𝕒𝕟𝕚𝕒

ℝ𝕖𝕒𝕝𝕚𝕥𝕪

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𝓡𝓮𝓪𝓵𝓲𝓽𝔂
(𝓷.) - 𝓣𝓱𝓮 𝔀𝓸𝓻𝓵𝓭 𝓸𝓻 𝓽𝓱𝓮 𝓼𝓽𝓪𝓽𝓮 𝓸𝓯 𝓽𝓱𝓲𝓷𝓰𝓼 𝓪𝓼 𝓽𝓱𝓮𝔂 𝓪𝓬𝓽𝓾𝓪𝓵𝓵𝔂 𝓮𝔁𝓲𝓼𝓽, 𝓪𝓼 𝓸𝓹𝓹𝓸𝓼𝓮𝓭 𝓽𝓸 𝓪𝓷 𝓲𝓭𝓮𝓪𝓵𝓲𝓼𝓽𝓲𝓬 𝓸𝓻 𝓷𝓸𝓽𝓲𝓸𝓷𝓪𝓵 𝓲𝓭𝓮𝓪 𝓸𝓯 𝓽𝓱𝓮𝓶.

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I fucking hate reality.

Why do I hate it? Well- Everything that is existing in reality should be hated. The fact that reality slams into your face whenever you think of something that is clearly impossible to happen. Everything you say would turn back against you, forcing you to think that whatever you say is the exact opposite of what you mean. When you ask for something it'll give you the opposite of what you ask.

Like the fact that you can't live without someone despite you saying that you can live without them.

When you're happy everything would suddenly come crashing down burying you deep into your own pitiful demise.

When you say that you're fine while smiling when you're in the brink of breaking down.

When someone asked to help you but you refused their help  when in fact you've been waiting for this moment to happen so you can somehow release that heavy feeling in your chest.

When you want to cry but your tears already run out.

When you feel that you want to die even though you just wanted to be saved.

We've been denying on what's in front of us, because we think that it isn't what we need.

I honestly think it is what we need.

We really can't live without someone that became a huge part of our fucked up lives. Why? Their role in our lives is the reason of our growth. We became accustomed  to their company that when they're missing, life isn't exactly the same when they're still a part of our story.

When you're happy everything would go down hill. It's the way reality makes us strong. It'll bring us down to the point that we're about to give up. Imagine yourself running in an obstacle race. You're the one who's currently in the lead and everyone is far behind you. You feel happy because you're ahead of them, only for you to fall down because of the obstacle that is in front of you that you overlooked. What would you do? Lay down on the fucking ground because you just fell? Of course not! You're going to stand up and win the fucking race and try your best to avoid the oncoming obstacles.

It's reality's message that we should always stand back up whenever we fall, 'cause the prize when we run back again while now avoiding the obstacles that made us fall would be all worth it. True victory is made by errors and sufferings.

When you say that you're fine while smiling when you're in the brink of breaking down. Ya know. It's okay to not be fine. Go ahead. Break down. Bottling your feelings is the worst way of dealing them. Bottling up your feelings is like blowing a balloon. When you think it's enough, stop already. Don't continue putting more air in the balloon. 'Cause next thing you'll know the balloon would explode to your face. It'll only harm you if you continue doing that.

When someone asked to help us, we shouldn't refuse it. Let them reach out to us. Let them help us. There's no problem that we can solve by our own. It's true! When you're a kid you need your teacher to explain why 1 + 1 = 2. Then your teacher would put 1 finger up in their hands asking you that if they have 1 finger up in their left hand and another on the right, How many fingers are up? Then you'll count the fingers and go like "o H  TWO  W O W."

When you want to cry but your tears already run out. Life wanted to tell you that "Stop crying bitch, take a break sometimes." Which is true, although crying is the most recommended way of venting your frustrations, anger and sadness. You shouldn't over do it. You should try finding another way on venting. Like, painting, use the colours to express how much you want the world to burn or something like that.

When you feel that you want to die even though you just wanted to be saved. If you ever feel this please do NOT end your life. It's not worth it. Ending your life would cause a never ending loop of sadness. How? If you end your life, a person that held you close to their heart would feel an immense amount of pain. They'll think that the pain is overbearing for them to feel so they'd soon end their life as well to stop it. After ending their life, another person that held them close to their heart would-- and the same scenario would happen again. Don't take your life away just because you feel that there's no reason for you to live for. Let someone in. Let them break your walls so they can save you.

See what I mean?

I hate how entertaining reality is.

I hate how you have to suffer to get what you desire.

I hate how life is like a crappy video game that gives you no instruction on how to play it, leaving you so confused.

I hate how true reality is.

And I specially hate how much I keep saying that I hate reality even if it's the only thing that gives me enough motivation to live.

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𝓒𝓱𝓲𝓷 𝓾𝓹 𝓫𝓪𝓫𝔂, 𝔂𝓸𝓾𝓻 𝓬𝓻𝓸𝔀𝓷 𝓲𝓼 𝓯𝓪𝓵𝓵𝓲𝓷𝓰

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