The right path

Fourteen

Harry laid in his bed reminiscing the day he had had. It had not been his best Christmas ever, but he had to admit it was very pleasant. He could get to know Tom better, the real Tom. For example, he had discovered, after begging for the information for nearly an hour, that Tom's birthday was on December 31. Too close, yet he could manage to get the boy something. After all, he did want to give the boy something special, since he knew Riddle had never had a birthday celebration.

It was late already, the stars visible for quite some time now, but he could not get himself to sleep. There was a lot going on in his head. Mostly, mixed emotions. He missed Ron and Hermione dearly, and that had put him down a little bit today. On the other hand, he was excited by the prospect of befriending Tom, making him hopeful that his goal of changing his path would succeed.

But most of all, he felt lonely. He could not share most of his feelings and past experiences with anyone, since they had not happened yet in this timeline, and that was hindering his friendly relationships. At least he thought so. He didn't want to lie to his friends, nor invent his 'memories'. It felt wrong.

Sometimes, like today, he wished he could tell someone. Tell them how he remembered his broomstick to be. How many chocolate frog cards there are in the future, compared to now. How he used to play with Dr. Filibuster's bengals with the Weasleys. Or how he was the youngest seeker of the century. Things like that. Things that would make him happy just by remembering them. Things that made him laugh, cry, or made him snort.

So he decided to call upon the only person he could talk to. Himself. From the future. James. Maybe he could cheer him up. This is when Harry discovered how to enter to his mindscape  at will.

It took him some time and frustration, but in the end, he managed to create a comfortable room to be in, with a little resemblance to the mixture of both the common rooms he knew. James already waiting for him in a big red sofa next to the chimney.

"Well, hello there, kiddo. It's been a while"

"Yeah."

James noticed how unresponsive Harry was being. What could he do to cheer him up, he still didn't know.

"What's up? Am I not a beautiful enough sight to make you happy?."

A loud snort was heard. What on earth had happened to Harry last time to end up that crazy?

"What the hell did you do to get this bad? I would have thought I could preserve my brains, not make them smaller than a bean! Or I don't know, get actually wiser with age, you know, what is expected."

"Well, for your information, the size of the brains doesn't define your intelligence, oh almighty wise Harry. Did you know that the average brain weighs approx 1400 grams? And Albert Einstein's brain weighed just 1230 grams! Take that!"

Silence. Utter silence. Harry was now mostly confused. Where did James get that information, and how was it relevant, really?

"Right...I guess I won't even ask."

"Aha, but you'll listen anyways! I mean, I get to do whatever I want in the Limbo while I wait for my time guiding you is over. I mostly read about medical subjects, I've got time to dwell on what things I could have done differently, and came to the conclusion that knowing a little about healing would have saved my ass sooo many times. And it's pretty interesting. So there, I've been reading. And listening to music too, sometimes. And no, I was as sane as you are before I died... almost as sane, I guess... but being the only thing existing at the Limbo, I am allowed to lose some of my marbles, don't ya think? Anyways, I know you are feeling down, care to tell me?

A soft sigh escaped Harry's lips. Feeling down, yes, sort of.

"It's just... I guess I miss some things. Hermione and Ron for one, this was my first Christmas without them, and before I knew them, I didn't even know Christmas. And I keep wondering what would have happened to my life if I had stayed with them. Then, I remembered I got my dad's invisibility cloak on that Christmas morning, and now, my dad hasn't even been born. That cloak, my photo album and my knitted sweaters were my treasures back then, and now I've got nothing to remember my family and friends in times like this, when I miss them the most."

James of course understood everything the younger boy was saying. And he had expected this to be mentioned sometime. That's why he did take that photo album and the knitted Weasley sweaters back in time, just as he did with Hedwig. They were currently hidden in a secret compartment in Harry's trunk.

"Would it make you feel better if I told you that the photo album and the sweaters are hidden in your trunk? I mean, I cannot give you the cloak, as Fleamont is currently the owner. "

"W-what?! You brought my photos too? And the Weasley sweaters? Why didn't you tell me?"

"You didn't ask, of course." James said with a wink in Harry's direction.

Honestly, why did he do to end up like that! It doesn't matter, though. The knowledge of having his precious items made him forgive James' behavior.

"And, although... I am not supposed to tell you this, I'll do it. But just if you forgive this old soul of mine...hehe, well... there is a big chance that our grandparents will adopt you once all your legal paperwork in the ministry is done. And then, maybe if lady luck is with you, you can get the cloak until  dad comes."

"D-do they really want me?"

"Of course they do, they've been trying to have kids of their own for some time now, and you are family, they wouldn't let you fend for yourself. In fact, James birth was a big surprise for them, after all, they were kind of old when they had him."

The stunned expression the young boy had plastered in his face was all it took for James to realize that Harry really needed something to lift his mood. To make him see he was important. Maybe he could talk a little about his own third year? Or not, not the events per se, just some things he still held close to his heart, without telling him about Sirius. Maybe even plant the idea so Harry made his own map, before the Marauder's. That was something worth revising later.

"Er...Harry? Do you know what your boggart is? I know you have read about them, but as far as I know, you haven't faced one, right?"

The drastic change of topic had caught Harry off guard. Sure, he had read about boggarts, but he had never encountered one, nor thought about what form it would take. What did he fear? The most obvious answer would be Voldemort, but now that monster didn't exist, so he found it stupid to still fear him. Then he thought he could be afraid of failing his task, failing to prevent the war...but how could a boggart represent a war? One that hadn't happened, at that. Afraid of the future? He really didn't know.

"I... haven't thought about it. But I guess this is important somehow. What was your boggart?"

"Dementors. Awful creatures, they make you experience the worst memories you have, sucking all your happy memories away, and finally, suck your soul too. I had an encounter with a dementor on the train ride to Hogwarts for my third year and heard that night. I could hear my parents dying, and passed out. I feared them above anything else. That's why I learnt the patronus charm, and obtained the record for being the youngest to cast a full pledged one, at that. I thought maybe you would like to keep that title, eh?"

"W-what? Are you...are you willing to teach me?"

Harry's mind was running wild. He knew the patronus charm was a very difficult light spell, it took most people trouble to get the first version of it: the mist, nevermind the full corporeal patronus. The only ones capable of such a feat were quite powerful and determined. Being able to learn it at thirteen years of age was quite astounding. It was a great opportunity he would never pass.

"Yeah, only for you kiddo. Well, not really, I already taught a big group how to do it. But at least I'm confident I'll be able to make you get the hang of it pretty quickly. How about we start once the school term starts too? That way you can spend your time now with ickle Tommykins." James said wiggling his eyebrows suggestively.

Harry was utterly embarrassed. He didn't exactly know why, but that last sentence had made him feel kind of anxious. He couldn't even pinpoint the feeling, it was so unlike himself that he didn't know how to name it.

"If Riddle had heard that, he would probably be on his way to killing you right now."

"Oh, but he already tried. So, lessons after the holidays?"

"Sounds good. Oi... Merry Christmas James."

"Merry Christmas Harry."

And for the first time in quite some time, Harry felt completely content, sleep finally making an appearance.