My Winter Bear

28

HANA'S POV:

      The sky was filled with dark clouds just like my eyes , rain drops falls on the ground just like my tears on my cheeks. It was supposed to be a best night fr me. Actually it was but he has to spoil it. After doing enough damage to my heart Taehyung s sleeping like a man who found his eternal peace. But my mind and soul left by body with his confession. He was gentle and passionate. He took care of me as if I'm a glass. He said sweets words while making love. But it was only me thinking that he made love. He was moaning Emily's name while making love to me. To be frank , he was just relieving his stress with the help of me. He wasn't making love to me.  He was making love with Emily. At last he said
"Love you so much Emily. I'll take care of you. I love you with all my heart. Rest well my love".
With those words he hugged me and drifted to sleep while I was crying in pain and betrayal. I know he wouldn't love me. But I thought this night will change it. But how much of a fool I was.

      He was thinking of Emily from the first. While he asked me to stay ,it was for Emily not me. While he asked me to let him love me, it was fr Emily not me. Why did I even agree to this in the first place?. Even though I was wrapped in his arms I felt the loneliness. Even though he kept me safe , I was afraid. Afraid of what the future holds fr me. Afraid that he will forget this night. Afraid what will be his reaction tomorrow morning.
I tried to get away from his arms but he tighten his hold on me.
"Stay....don't leave me". Was the only words he said the whole night. It was fr Emily not me. He wants Emily not me. Fr every girl her first time s special but fr me its a nightmare. A worst nightmare which I never wished to happen. But out life s not in our hands.

       After confirming that he slept I moved away from his hands. I don't want his touches. It remains me of this mistake I did. The mistake that I let him take me.
I was sitting on the edge of the bed with the bedsheets wrapped around my naked body preventing it from the cold. Tears streamed down my face just like the climate right outside the window. Its feel like the sky s crying with me. Don't know how long was I crying cause the alarm rang indicating my wake up time. Not wanting him to wake up and definitely not wanting to stay in his room anymore I took my clothes that are shattered in the ground, wore it and left to my room.

        Entering my bathroom I stripped and saw my neck till my chest full of hickeys given by Taehyung. I would have said love bites but what he did was not love me. He used me as his stress reliever. Shaking my head I steeped inside the shower and took a long one. I just pray to God that whatever happens pls let it be good. I can't tolerate another pain that this.

          I made all his favorite breakfast hoping he will talk with me and was waiting fr him in the dinning room. Asusual he walked down the stairs wearing his office attire and walked past the dinning room.
"Taehyung ...I made breakfast". My voice stopped him. He turned to see me and his eyes widened. He came closer to me and
"I'll already have a bad headache. Don't make it worst fr me. Just shut your mouth and stay quiet". Wait....did he not remember anything from yesterday??.
"Taehyung do you remember what you did yesterday?".  His eyebrows met together and he immediately shook his head in denial. That was the time my whole world crashed down. Tears streamed like a river from my eyes without my control.
"Why r u crying ?". He asked in monotune.
"You don't remember anything?". I asked in disbelief. I thought at least he will remember this. But he shook his head as no and stared at me. My mouth released a sob followed by many. If I say he won't believe me. He will say I took advantage of him. what should I do?.

      Just then Jimin entered inside the house and looked straight at me. He understood that something happened between me and Taehyung.
"Hana are you okay ?". He asked in his soft voice. Not believing on my voice I nodded my head and wiped my tears.
"Hey Taehyung how r u feeling now?".
"Bad headache. But I'm good. Did I do something so awful yesterday cause i cant remember anything. My mind s complete blank". Taehyung replied. Jimin understood the hidden meaning in it and turned to face me. He gave me a nod and
"Taehyung I won't be coming to office today.  All your meetings details are on your table".  Taehyung noticed all the looks Jimin gave me and just nodded his head in approval to Jimin and left fr work.