Gettin' high with the french

Jefferson's POV:

 I had just docked my ship into the harbor, ready to draft a declaration with Lafayette. As I was gettin' off the boat, the captain came up to me holding a small satchel of some kind of dried plant with a strong scent to it. "What is this and why did you give it to me?", I ask him. "I don't really know but it's exotic and if you put it in a pipe, you feel all giggly, and I love it.", he said before placing the bag in my hand and getting back on the ship.

  I got in the carriage, the small bag still in the pocket of my coat, I looked out the window and saw Lafayette waving at me. "BONJOUR!", he shouted. "Alright, so where's this declaration we gotta write?",I ask, after all, that was the whole reason I came to France in the first place. "Ah, ze declaration, it is in my office, mon ami.", he replies, as he notices the strong scent from my the bag in my pocket. "Why do you smell like you just got sprayed by a skunk?", he asks as we walk through the hallway. I tilt my head in confusion before realizing he was talking about the bag of dried leaves in my pocket. "Oh that, yeah, that's just a bag of dried leaves someone gave me, he said something about putting them in a pipe and smoking them? I didn't really pay that much attention to him, to be honest.", " Oh, well zat sounds fun, maybe we could do zat after we write zis declaration.", Lafayette suggested.

 We got into his office, which was surprisingly nice despite the fact that basically everyone in France who wasn't a noble was in poverty, and got writin'. A few hours of writin' go by, I won't bore you by transcribin' everythang we wrote in that declaration, but I do think we did a fantastic job at makin' our point to the nobles that we were gonna revolt. As I got out the door, I noticed that It was snowin', like, it was snowin' a LOT. I quickly realize that I was gonna have to stay inside until they could shovel the roads to a point where they weren't so deep that all the horses would freeze to death and make it impossible for them to drive my carriage back to the harbor. AND WHY THE HELL WAS IT EVEN SNOWIN' SO MUCH IN THE MIDDLE OF AUGUST!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! "AH, GREAT, I'M GONNA HAVE TO STAY INSIDE ANOTHER THREE WEEKS AIN'T I, WHAT AM I EVEN S'POSED TO DO WITH THAT TIME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!", I complained. Lafayette gestured towards my pocket and I immediately knew what he was suggesting.

  Lafayette's POV:

I ran over to ze kitchen and pulled out a flint and steel striker from ze cabinet, as well as two tobacco pipes, and ran back into my office.  "I have ze supplies, now let's light zis sucker up.", I tell Jefferson. He pours some of ze contents of ze bag into ze pipe, as I do ze same wis my pipe. We light zem up and I could immediately feel ze effects of ze plant. It felt as if I was floating, and it felt as if I was floating very high up. In fact, one could say I felt, Je ne sais pas, high. "Hey Jefferson, isn't it strange zat you kinda look exactly like me?", "WHOAH!, that's like, crazy!!", Jefferson replied, clearly just as high as I was.  "What if someone in ze future decided to make a play about us and zey used ze same actor to play both of us?", I replied. "I'd pay top dolla to see that play.", Jefferson giggled.

Jefferson's POV:

  "Do ya think it's called sand, 'cuz between the sea and the land?",  Lafayette just responded with "Bruh." I was startin' to get bored of just sittin' and smokin', besides, the snow had already melted, which was weird 'cause I'm pretty sure they said it would be 'bout three more months 'til the road was safe to travel on. Either way, everyone back home was expectin' that I'd be off in Paris much longer than I actually wound up bein' there. I couldn't let them see me coming home so quickly, It'd look like I didn't do anything to help the French, and as the ambassador, goin' home after one day, while high as a kite, everyone would probably think I'm a failure. NO! I wasn't gonna let them think I failed, I was gonna stay in Paris and smoke this strange plant with Laff 'til I ran out of strange plant to smoke!!!!!

 Lafayette's POV:

 "Do you sink we should give a name to zis plant we are smoking?", I suggest to Monsieur Jefferson. "I was thinking we could name it like, Mary Jane or somethin'?", he responded. "Or somesing would be a strange name for a plant.", I respond jokingly. "Well, it is a strange plant.", said Jefferson. "You do make quite a good point, mon ami.", I reply as we high-five each ozer. "Are you hungry mon ami, because I am starving.", I tell Jefferson. AND ZAT IS WHEN MONSIEUR JEFFERSON AND I CAME UP WIS ZE MOST BRILLIANT IDEA IN ZE HISTORY OF MANKIND!!!!!!!!!!!!

  "LET'S STEAL ZE DECLARATION OF INDEPENDENCE!!!!!", I declared independently! "But I'm the one who wrote the Declaration Of Independence?", he deadpanned. "WELL ZEN, WE SHALL STEAL ZE DECLARATION OF RIGHTS OF MAN INSTEAD!!!!!!!", I shouted! "Laffy, I hate to burst your bubble, but the Declaration Of Rights Of Man is right here.", he said while gesturing over to my desk. I was starting to get bored and hungry. "Hey, what if we raided a bread cart?", I suggested.

"Lafayette, you ABSOLUTE GENIUS!!!!!" Jefferson exclaimed.

 Jefferson's POV:

"Ok, so you seduce the lady runnin' the cart and once she's distracted, I'll steal all the bread. Got it?" Lafayette nodded approvingly as we started making our way to the cart.  

"So, you come here ofsen?", Laff flirted with the bread lady. I was a little bit jealous if I'm bein' honest, but that wasn't important, all that matters now is bread.

"I must say, having to haul around zis bread cart all by yourself must be very PAINful ;)" Lafayette joked. It took me a few seconds to get it, but once I did, I abSOLUteLy HOWLED with laughter!!!!!!!

"OH I GET IT, 'CUZ PAIN IS FRENCH FOR BREAD!!!!!!!!!!!!", I shouted, completely forgetting about our stealth plan. 

"RUN!!!!!!!", I shouted at Laffayete once I realized we had been caught trying to steal the bread! Laff jumped onto the bread cart, pushed himself forwards, grabbed my hand, and we started rollin' through the streets of Paris!!!!!!!! We careened through the streets, barreling into everythang, the wind blowin' through our incredibly sexy, curly black hair!!!! "VIVA LA REVOLUTION!!!!!!!!!!!!" Laffayete and I shouted at the tops of our lungs as we crashed through a random window, still blazing through Paris while high as kites!!!!!!!!!!!!

We eventually managed to get chased all the way into the countryside, where we managed to get the bread lady off our trail. "Zat was ze most fun I've had in a long time.", Laffayette confessed to me, taking a baguette out of the cart, breaking it in half and giving me one half. "Well, I gotta get back to Monticello.", I told him. "WAIT!!!!!!!!! before you get back on ze ship, I would like to give you somesing." "What is it?" He then grabs my shoulder, leans towards my cheek and KISSES ME!!!!!!!

A/N: SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!! SO CUTE YES FINALLY!!!!!!!! I'VE FINISHED THIS FIC!!!!!!!!! It's a little nonsensical, but this is an early writing work of mine, and I usually spend weeks obsessing over every detail of a story before I actually write it (which I didn't do for this fic) so yeah. Hope you enjoyed it. total word count: 1322

"Did you hear someone say something Laff?" 

"Zat's probably just because of how high we are, Mon ami, just ignore it."