Eccedentesiast •CYJ [✔️]

21

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CHAPTER. 21

"Thank you byeol" yeonjun lean his head on her shoulder. I just smile feeling his warm.

"Seems like everything is back to normal? " I ask, he just hmm " soobin try to make our dad understand. Though it was hard at first, but later he said he understand it and he was very guilty for beating me " guilty..? Was he really guilty for beating his own son?

"So, you are free to make options right? " I ask again and he nod his head again. "It's been a long time I felt so relief "he sigh in relief.

"You had suffered enough, Jun"I stare at him as my hand gently stroke his yellow hair. "Not as much as you"he mumbled

"Stop comparing my problem with yours, lemon head" I frown but he engulf me in his embrace with his head hide into my neck.

"I'm reminding you again, we are here for you "his voice is husky, it vibrates on my neck. "Alright, alright, now stop hugging. "I push him away but tighten the hug.

"Shiro,You are so warm "he whine

"What a scene "we both quickly pull away from each other just to see Taehyun and soobin. not only mine but yeonjun's face was crimson red as well.

"Why don't you both just start dating, my god. "Beomgyu comes in with huening make both of our ears to turns red. "Excuse me "i  said as she answered the call from Taehyung

"Byeol, what are you doing? " he ask me  the moment i answer the call "break time, why? "

"Did jungkook call you? "

"Jungkook? Nope, what happened? " i ask

"Just an argument with seokjin hyung. "He sigh in frustration seokjin oppa and jungkook?

"About what? " i was more than surprised to hear that jungkook had an argument with seokjin. i  knows that how they both always bicker over anything, but then they both rarely have any argument.

"Uh?... It's nothing serious. Don't worry about it,  I'll take to you later. Bye "he just quickly hung up the call.

"Yah, jeon jungkook. Where are you? "  i ask when he answer the call in third ring. "Byeol... I fought with jin hyung "his voice is shaky

"I don't know why or about what you both fight over, but you both needs to talk out. Don't forget to apologize to him, You heard me? "I tell him as he sigh

"byeol.... I wish I could goes back to the time where I discovered jimin having suicidal thoughts. I wished that I could have hint you all that he tried to hurt himself. I wished I could have stop him from running across the street and save the kid. "He is crying. It is a mournful cry, he is in pain.

"Jeon, where are you? "i ask in frown. "Byeol, it hurts so bad.Im so fucking guilty for not lend him a shoulder to cry on, to let him relief his pain... I let him suffered alone.. "

What exactly happened...?

"Jungkook, please! Tell me where are you?" i literally yelled out in desperate, making the 5 boys to look at me in concerned.

"Don't you Dare to do something that I will hate you forever. "i gritted teeth in anger, scared and anxious.

"I just want to be alone "with that, he hung up  "shit "i cursed and look the boys as i let out a  sigh in frustrated, one problem after another ....

Jeon
-Don't skip your class to find me.
-I will wait for you at your cousin's house

Byeol
-you better be

i told the boys about what happened briefly, As they told me not to worried about it so much. The whole time, my mind is full of jungkook confessing about his thought.

If he were to think like that,  then what about me?  i didn't caught anything suspicious about my beloved brother was suffering from depression that leads him to be a suicidal. i had no single clue about him taking such a huge responsibilities to take care of me stressed him out.

Till now, i blame myself for not being there for jimin as well. Not only jungkook,Taehyung and Yoongi but all of the member blame themselves, i blame myself for being the burden to jimin. i blame myself for being born, i blame my existence that just destroy the whole family, jimin deserve everything.

Instead of taking notes on what the teacher teach, i start to scribble on my exercise book.

Why I wasn't there for you?
Why you have to suffer because of me?
Why did I not notice any changes?
Why was I being a burden to you?
Why did I born and ruin everything?
Why am I even born?

I'm sorry,  I forget that because of me you are laying in hospital.
I'm sorry,  I forget that you were suffering because of me.
I'm sorry,  I forget that I should blame myself for making you gone through all this because of me..
I'm sorry,  I forget about you and ...smile happily.

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Yeonjun who is her seat mate frown when he wants borrow her book thinking she was taking the notes. How should I make her understand that her existence is so important.... but he realize that no matter what he or the other member do, till jimin is awake she is going to blame herself

"At this rate, I don't think I'll be able to focus on her studies... "She mumbled to herself as she takes the book she is going to do revision when Yeonjun told her that next week the teacher will be giving them a small test.

"I can help you "she close her locker just to face yellow hair and purple hair. "What?" She ask

"We can help you with your studies "soobin smile and ruffle her brown lock, Yeonjun who witness this is so jealous that he fake cough to give a signal to soobin.

But soobin act oblivious and look at the now jealous yeonjun "hyung, you okay? "

"Yea,let's go" he grab young byeol's wrist and walk away with soobin trying his best to hide his laugh "wait for me, you both" he yell and catch up the two.

*****

"Jungkook hyu-" Taehyun's word was cut off with byeol running towards the male in speed before hugging him tightly that makes jungkook to stumble a little.

"Byeol what's wr-"

" do you how worried I was? how the hell could you just hung up your call like that. "She break the hug before hitting his chest for a few times

"Listen here, jeon jungkook. I can't afford to lose any of you, you told me you are so guilty. Then what about me? So, please don't do anything stupid "she glare at him as the older boy stare at her in surprised.

"Can I borrow her? " jungkook ask the rest of the boys but eye contact with yeonjun since he held hands with her
Yong byeol grab yeonjun's arm making him to look at her, she gently smile at him in which he smile back

"I'll be waiting " with that they both walk off, as yeonjun keep staring at their back till it disappeared.  "That was so cringy " taehyun and soobin act like they were about to vomit while huening kai and beomgyu both act so dramatically making yeonjun wrap his arms around their head and headlock them.

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