𝐄𝐯𝐚𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐜𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞

𝟎𝟏 | 𝐇𝐞𝐫 𝐏𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐯𝐞

When I was a little girl, all I ever wanted was to be happy. Happy with whatever I received, whichever caught my eye. I was elated with the little things in life and of course, I knew how to count my blessings every second. The small pleasures of life such as Chocolates, Toffees, Lollipop, Popcorn, Doughnuts and any type of Candy made me happy and then, as I grew older my preferences changed into liking teddy bears, cartoons, colouring books and pretty dresses but most of all, when Ammi tied my hair in pigtails and Abbu praised me for being the good daughter I am.

Of course, by that time my only sister Noor was with us and the amount of attention I received from my parents was divided but I knew that my ammi and abbu loved both their daughters equally and that I can count on them anytime.

When I was a teenager, my priority other than attending school was to read books. Various kinds of books by different authors. Ones where the main protagonist, the girl dreams of becoming the most generous person to everyone, ones where the Princess would fight with every demon who tries to stop her and especially the genre of books where at the end, the Prince and the Princess lived happily ever after. I always enjoyed fairy-tale stories, romantic endings.

Perhaps I believed too much in the concept of finding true love at a very young age and piling up dreams for a lifetime. Or perhaps I wasn't aware of the demons residing in the outer world, immersing myself so much in the 'happy ending' of stories which turned me blind from seeing facts. Perhaps I was unaware that life is not a fairy-tale.

How my parents have been there for me, have pampered me, protected me from the evil made me grow weak even without my knowledge to tolerate suffering in life, to cross the obstacles that I have to come across. Maybe how my budding insecurities about trying to recognize people or make friends whom I can call my family apart from my parents and sister made me feel alone.

Irrespective of my upbringing and the faith I had in love, I was in a huge dilemma when I truly started believing that I had found love. How I fought for my relationship during my young years, how I took a stand against my parents was my fault. I was immature, stubborn and hell-bent on marrying the man that I had fallen in love with and I did it. I mean getting married to the one I love. But against my parents' wishes.

He was my happy place. His sugar-coated words weren't pretentious instead bliss to me and he made me perceive that life can turn in to a fairy tale if you believed in it. I supported and embraced his ambitions and dreams. I accepted that this was the life that I always wanted. I never showed a specific interest in working after completing my education neither my parents forced me nor did he ask me to find a job to get busy whenever he was not home. I found Pottery interesting though I wasn't very good at it. I was an ardent fan of movies and well, two and two put together I never felt alone since we had servants as well. I lived in my world when he was working hard to earn money for both of us. But the question is, was that all a lie?

When I muse about my past, all I can see is a facade. Betrayal, deceit, a sham. Was our relationship based on fake promises? Were we even... no! Was he even in love with me? Was that all an act of pretense where he was with me only because I was married to him? Because I was his lawfully wedded wife? Because I had ditched my parents and their advice for my well-being only to be with him? To spend the rest of my life with the one I love? I don't know and of course I may never get to know.

But I was through with that. I was through with the fact that our relationship had gone the drain the day his feelings slowly started growing for another woman, who is not his wife. The day he started admiring a woman the way a man would ponder about his opposite s** romantically, he took her hand in his and danced in the heavy pouring rain, he walked with her to a place where nobody knew. It was over for us.

He cheated on me without wasting a second to remember how we had come a long way fighting for our love, a life of togetherness. He cheated on me while I was eagerly waiting for him to come and embrace me. As I walked into a gift shop in Mussourie, where everything was fancy and colourful, for me, everything was indeed turning in to a colourful future as I met him on that unforgettable day.

Right before the storm hit my life, right before I had to accept that my marriage life was over. 

--- Continue on to the next chapter ---

🍸 ˢᵉʷʷⁱ 🍸