"Timothy Davis Hamilton, turn to face me. Right now!" I ordered.
"Or what? What are you going to do to me?" Instead of turning around, Timmy stood up and walked away, still having his back to me. "You're not mommy; you're just my big sister, and you will never replace her."
That was it. I'd had enough.
"Yeah that's true, I can never replace mommy. But have you ever thought about how hard I tried? No! All you ever thought of was yourself! You only care how you feel and haven't have the faintest idea about how hard it was for everybody else!" I half-shouted.
"I just miss mommy!" He retorted.
"Well I don't?" I felt my face reddening with anger.
"Sis! That's not what I mean!" Timmy explained, rather defensively. He finally turned around to face me, yet this time it was me that turned my back to him.
"Or what did you mean?" I yelled, fuming. "That's how you made me feel!"
I knew it was improper to yell at a 6-year-old, but I was in such a bad mood to say anything delightful to the ear, and I could barely control my temper.
"Don't you think that I, as a girl, need a mother more than you boys do?"
Silence.
"Do you know how hard I was trying to take the place of a mother at only 10 years old? I might not be a good one, for I was only 7 to 10 years older than you boys, and I was learning as well when taking care of you. But at least I was doing my best to try to mend the sorrow that we all share!" I felt a stray tear roll down my left cheek and quickly wiped it off. I shouldn't be crying.
"I knew it must be especially difficult for daddy since he lost his beloved wife, and for you who lost your mommy at such a young age, so I must toughen up and shoulder the responsibility of caring for everyone, just like what mommy used to do. That didn't mean that I wasn't sad myself! I did scream and cry and break down, just not in front of you; I knew I needed to stay strong and all while you could still act like a baby!"
Tears splashed down my cheeks and blurred my vision as I rushed out of the house. I couldn't take it anymore.
YOU ARE READING
Project W
AcakW is for Wattpad and Writing! :) ~~~ It has always been my dream to be a writer, yet I always fall into the same "pattern" - that is, I come up with some ideas and write them down, but then I encounter writer blocks and have trouble continuing. Ther...
