HOPELESS ᵈ·ᵏᵃᵐⁱⁿᵃʳⁱ

ch. ─── eleven

[11] TRUE DESIRES

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SHOTO TODOROKI, IS who occupied Hajime's thoughts that night, but in a way, she didn't expect it to. It's been a month since she enrolled in UA, and surprisingly Hajime has somehow befriended some of the most unlikely people in the process.

Disregarding the obvious, Todoroki was one of those unlikely people.

It was just a few weeks ago when Hajime was practically drooling over him, glued to his side as she batted her pretty lashes at him. Obsessed with making him hers, she ignored practically everyone around her, careful not to blatantly brush off someone to keep up her ridiculous facade.

But after last week when she was in the nurse's office, Hajime realized that she really did care for him. He was sincere and a great listener, something she haven't even noticed until that day. He also treated her as an equal, even if she was set on deceiving everyone about her clueless approach, he never got impatient and stayed by her side.

He really was a cool guy, just like Kaminari said.

So as Hajime aimlessly stared up at her dorm room's ceiling, her notebooks and random looseleaf littering the table beside her, she continued to contemplate her motifs. Dragging Todoroki into her small revenge wasn't something she wanted to do anymore.

And just to make her decision even more clear, she deleted his number and asked him the other day herself.

She was ultimately lost in all honesty, her heart beating in her chest rhythmically as her plump lips twisted with thought. It was a topic Hajime needed to let out in the open, but the only two people she trusted enough were currently busy. Areum was cracking down on her studies for her finals, and on top of that, figuring out which university to apply to. And then her other friend whom she's haven't spoken to in two months, Hiromi, was nowhere to be heard.

The situation with Hiromi was one Hajime tried not to dwell on, the way they parted back at Shiketsu, not the one she wished for. Hiromi didn't understand why she left, not at all convinced by her reasoning of going to a better school. Hiromi was sad but mostly angry about how Hajime ran away from her problems. Nevertheless, that was the type of person she was, so Hajime just avoided Hiromi for the time being so she can hopefully understand her reasonings as time passed, and not judge her instead.

With a sigh, Hajime looked to her side to see an old box she hid under her bed, which brought her wandering mind back to her main problem.

Telling the truth to everyone was really hard to imagine for Hajime, frightening and teeth-chattering for how it will shift their impressions of her. Yet, how was she supposed to reach her goal when everyone knew what type of person Hajime really was now? Shrewd and conniving, only looking out for herself and nobody else? And why? Just because she has trust issues—so she has a reason to be this way?