Second Chance Mates

-25- 🌹 Be Honest With Me

"My love is unconditional, make no mistake. I don't ask for much, just be honest with me. I don't ask for much, just be honest with me."
~Jason Mraz, 'Be Honest'

~~~

*Landon's POV*

Over the past month, I thought I had gotten to know Ryland pretty well. He wears his heart on his sleeve in a way that's made me feel comfortable with opening up to him. Just a few nights ago, Ryland held me while I cried after having a panic attack, and then we spent the night talking about my past with Easton.

I genuinely trusted him, and I thought the feeling was mutual. While I've known he has some baggage he didn't want to talk about, I assumed he would at some point. I didn't think I would have to wait for him to have a fucking seizure in my arms. Because now, it's not going to be his choice to tell me. He has to tell me, and that's what hurts.

Ryland is curled up in a ball on his bed, guilt swirling in his eyes. He hasn't said a word since he woke up half an hour ago, and I've just been sitting quietly for him to say something. Anything.

I want to feel angry, but I don't even know what I'm angry about. Ronnie and Kai refused to tell me anything, so I had to wait for Ryland to wake up. In the meantime, I got him dressed and dabbed his heated skin with a cold rag until he came to. Even if I'm upset with him, I'm still going to take care of him.

'I felt him, I felt River,' Leo whines, pacing around in my mind. 'He's suffering, I know it.'

'I'll ask him about River, but I need him to be the first one to talk,' I tell him. 'He's been keeping a lot from us, and it's time we learned the truth before we can move forward with this relationship.'

Leo whimpers but fades back into my mind on the promise that I'll find out what happened to River. I can sense that he wants to keep pushing the issue and fight with me more about it, but the herbs are making him too weak.

"I'm sorry," Ryland croaks in a raspy voice after nearly an hour of silence.

"I don't even know yet what you're sorry about," I point out flatly, making him wince.

"It's just... I was scared, Landon. I still am. I've been worried that if I told you the truth about what I am, you would reject me. And I can't be rejected again, Landon, I can't."

"You don't think I was scared? You don't think it was hard for me to open up to you? I told you about Easton, about how I've been a rogue for the past five years. Things I was nearly certain you would reject me for, but you didn't. Why couldn't you put that same trust in me?"

My words cut him to the quick, and his eyes begin to water. My arms ache with the need to embrace and comfort him, but I hold myself back. I can't give into him, not until he gives me something first.

"Is your hand okay?" He redirects the conversation to the burn on my hand. I sigh, clenching my fist. The wound is healing, although slowed down since my wolf abilities have been stunted by the herbs.

"It'll be fine," I assure him. "Although I would still like to know why your collar would shock me in the first place."

"I'm sorry," he repeats, looking down at his lap.

"You don't have to be sorry. You just have to be honest with me," I say, scooting closer towards him. "I thought we had made a lot of progress lately, and we'd established trust. Was I wrong in thinking that?"

Ryland's glossy eyes widen. "No! I do trust you."

"Then talk to me. Tell me what you're so scared of."