𝕐𝕖𝕝𝕝𝕠𝕨 || 𝕎𝕚𝕝𝕝ℕ𝔼 ✔︎

10

19 May 2020

Hey Jade,

Happy Anniversary. To be honest I'm not so happy. I had such a nice night planed for ages. But then you left. I was going to take you out for dinner. Our favourite little place, and then we would eat a lovely meal. When you looked at the bill, because you always would, it would have "Will you marry me? - Love Will" written on it. I was hoping you would look up, see me on one knee with a ring in a small box and say yes. But why would you. This is all my fault. The boys say it's not but I know that's just to make me feel better. It's hard when you look your friends in their eyes and say you believe them, when you really don't. Anyway, today isn't about me, it's all about you and I want you to know that I loved you then, love you still, always have, always will.

Love Will xxx ♡︎

"What an idiot." Will thought to himself. He knew he should of wrote that he had started self harming. He needed to put it out there somehow. But he was a fool and didn't.

For Will, there was always something he thought he should self harm for. He had a routine. When ever he needed to see blood poor from his arms, he would run into his bathroom and grab his blade. Then he would slowly sink down the wall close his eyes tightly, only to open them again and start slicing his arm.

Will spoke to himself, " One, nobody loves me. Two, I'm ugly and fat. Three, I'm gonna lose everyone I love. Four, I need to die. And five, I need Jade back."

Every time he would say the same thing, this could be up to four times a day. He was starting to run out of room on his arms, so he would have to move to his legs.

As tears ran down his face and blood dropped out of his arms, he put his head back against the wall, remembering the good times with Jade that were now long gone.