Safe With Me

Chapter 20

I felt myself drifting back into a dark place. Mom's getting worse, and I don't know how to deal with it. I've tried immersing myself with school work, but even my paintings were lackluster. Summer knows something's up, but I wasn't ready to discuss it with her. Unfortunately that's taken a toll on our relationship.

Olivia has texted me that she was in town and wanted to see me. I knew she could tell I was keeping something from her. But we haven't really been talking, but she's always been able to pick up on my moods.

"Sage can we talk please?" Olivia said over the phone.

"Sure."

"Meet me at the cafe, okay?"

"I'll be there in 10." I said and hung up. What the fuck is wrong with me? I just need to be honest and things can be better.

I walked to the cafe place, since it was only a 7 minute walk from me and got a small table for Olivia and I. I saw her walk in after a few minutes, and I waved her over with a half smile.

"Hey." She said with a smile.

"I ordered you a coffee."

"Thanks." She looked out the window for a second then back at me. "What's going on Sage? I know you're not telling me something, and I want to be there for you. I don't want you going through something alone." She bit her lip nervously and looked at me.

"How can you tell?" My eyes dropped to the table going over my options. It is difficult keeping this all to myself. Tears began falling down my cheek unintentionally.

"Oh Sage." She pulled her chair next to me and brought me into a warm comforting hug. "You're my best friend, I always know when something's wrong. I know things have been a bit weird since the last time I saw you, but I'm here for you. What's wrong?"

"She's sick." I cried into her shoulder and she soothingly ran her fingers through my hair.

"Who's sick?"

"My mom, she has lung cancer." I said honestly.

"I am so sorry." She pulled back and held onto my hands. "When did you find out?"

"Just before school ended towards the beginning of summer."

"You shouldn't have to go through this all alone Sage. What can I do?"

I attempted to wipe the tears from my eyes, but they just kept coming. "I just need this. You being here is enough."

"How about we go for a drive?" I looked up and noticed a few people staring. I silently nodded my head and she led us to her car.

"What are you in town for?"

"Eh just needed a break I guess. Plus I wanted to see you." She put her car into drive and we ended up driving along the coast.

"I'm sorry I've been acting so weird. You just caught me by surprise, but I can't lie and say what you said hasn't been on my mind since. If I wasn't in a relationship..."

"I know, it's okay Sage. I guess I'm just bad at getting the timing of things right." She let out an understanding chuckle. "But you have more important things to worry about than me."

I nodded my head and smiled. Olivia rolled the windows down and turned the music up a little. "Do you want to talk about your mum?"

"Maybe, I don't know. It's hard you know, just thinking about her makes me want to break down. I see her every Saturday and Sunday and it hasn't gotten any easier. I know I've already seen her at her lowest point, but this is a whole different level. I don't know how to act around her. I try to talk to her like things are normal, but they're not. I'm so scared every fucking day that I'm going to lose her. I can't lose her Olivia." At this point Olivia had pulled over into this little parking section that overlooked the ocean.