One Door Away

Chapter 1

I might feel normal on some days, but mostly I feel worthless - a big fat burden. You know how enthralling it is watching people's lavish lives, with them spending money, not caring about how to pay bills? Well, that's my dream life, and money has always been an issue for me but I find ways. I truly think that money is the root of evil because even the most virtuous person could be enchanted by it; indeed the greed of humans knows no bounds.

Ever since I was born, I've been living a life filled with bad luck. My birth was a mistake, but my mother decided to keep me.

Oh, how regretful it is.

It would've been better if things didn't go that way, so that I wouldn't have to go through this painful thing called living. In a lifetime, besides physical illness, you also must go through challenges where they say are supposed to make you stronger; I wish it was like that. However, life does not make you stronger - it eats you away until you die.

In my case, one might see me as a pessimist but what I truly am is a visionary who lacks the opportunities and privilege other people have, in turn, I open my eyes to what the world truly is - a rotten piece of garbage. It has always been like that and it will never change; for me, at least. Even if the world's political system has turned into a socialist one, it would still be as chaotic as humans.

Again, that's just me and it's not the same for everyone.

Going back to my story, I don't really know if you could call it a tragedy but when I was around one, my mother left me on a train thinking I was in her arms the whole time. Like, who would be so unfortunate that your own mother would forget that she misplaced you?

My mom and dad got their marriage annulled a year after I was born, wherein my mom got custody. I'm not blaming my parents for the bad things that happened in my life, but I honestly think that my circumstance would be better if they hadn't separated.

If I were to describe all the unfortunate events that has happened, it would take a lot of time and become repetitive and boring. Also, a side note, I contracted pneumonia at a young age and after that period, where my mom had a hard time paying the hospital bills, more hardcore stuff happened.

But that's not what this story's about. It's not about the despair I felt but about the despair I will feel because I'm that unlucky. I think when I was being made, God poured all the clownery in me. Anyway, I have to stop this ugly beautiful moment of mine in the shower. I still need to go to class.

I turned off the shower head and as the sounds stopped, I looked in the mirror. I observed my face, looked at my reflection - a bright damn mess. I know I'm the bigger-picture type of person, but when it comes to my body I get so nitpicky about my appearance. I have hazel eyes and black hair that resembled a military cut. I don't bother dealing with my hair because it has always been that way and other cuts don't suit me at all.

From top to bottom, I observed myself at the mirror and ran the towel on my hair until it dried out. I rummaged through my messy cabinet to find my toothbrush and toothpaste.

My bathroom, ignoring the fact that the cabinet was completely disorganized, was spotless. I can never bathe with a dirty bathroom - yuck! It just feels like swimming on a dirty lake with all the janitor fishes surrounding me.

I was soon done with my morning routine, from the moisturizer to the sunblock. That's it. Nothing more, nothing less. It's not that I don't want to spend money on face products, it's that I can't with everything I'm spending already. Remember? I walked towards my closet, searching for the uniform the university provided.

Our uniform has a logo on its pocket on the right chest, with two swords crossing each other symbolizing unity and power. Underneath the black blazer with a white and crimson striped collar was the plain white top I wore which hasn't been washed for about a day already.