Let me love you

Chapter 1

I stood in the line full of screaming, hysterical girls, all holding 5sos CDs and chattering excitedly about the band. I couldn't believe I was here with them, also holding a copy of their dreadful music, because believe me, I hated them more than anyone. The only reason I bothered to turn up was because my brat of a little sister had recently become obsessed with them even though she knew what Ashton did to me and she wanted a signed cd for Christmas. I saw no other way because I certainly wasn't going to unblock his number and ask him for it personally.

Ever since Ashton and I had broken up last year, I had tried to block them out of my life but it was getting a hell of a lot harder. When I left him, the band had just started touring with one direction and they were a bunch of nobodies but now their face was on every taxi, billboard, poster and I couldn't escape the idiots.

" just keep your head down, it's been so long he won't recognise you," I repeated to myself in my head, god I was dreading this.

My thoughts were interrupted when a girl in a pink vest and the most fake eyelashes I had ever seen turned around and started speaking to me.
" Oh em gee, hi my names Kelsey what's yours??" She chirped.

" I'm poppy," I replied, really not in the mood for a conversation.

" your names pretty. Who's your fave? Mines Luke! Oh my god he's just so cute and I love him so much! I don't really like the rest of the band but Luke's great!"

I smirked. I'm not in the " 5sos fam" but I knew enough about the boys to know that this girl was what was known as a 5soser.

" oh really? So what's your favourite song? " I tested her.

"Oh obviously she looks so perfect and don't stop," she giggled and I had to hold back my laughter. Girls around us turned around to give her dirty looks.

" oh my god, we're so close to the front I need to redo my mascara, nice talking to you," she said as she turned around whipping her hair in my face and pulling out maybelline makeup.

Before I knew it, it was my turn and I was being shoved forward by a security guard, towards ash. I gulped , pulled my hood over my head and aimed my stare at the ground.

***

" hi, my names Ashton. What's yours?" He greeted and I panicked, making something up.

" I'm Kendra," I mumbled.
" do you want a photo, um- Kendra?"
Crap.crap crap crap crap crap. I was going to have to lift my head.

I sighed and yanked my hood off and his face dropped when he saw mine.

"Poppy? Why-" I cut him off.
" I'm not here for the reason you think I am, my sister just wanted a signed cd. Trust me, It's not like I would ever want to see you again by choice"

"I'm sorry- I just didn't expect to see you here. Is there anyway you could come back stage and we could talk for a minute. I have to talk to you." He rested his hand on mine and I almost jumped back in surprise.
No. There was no way I was doing this, there was no way I was going to get dragged back into this game, I would be the only one who ended up getting hurt again. I knew that and he knew that.
" No. Just sign the cd like I came here for and leave me alone. "
He sighed and reluctantly did what I said.As I turned around to leave I felt a large hand grab mine and I flinched. Everything came flooding back. Images of us flicked through my head like a movie and I was dumb founded. I saw the first time he kissed me and I felt my stomach explode like it did that night and I saw us sitting on the beach in each others arms while he kissed the top of my fore head and rubbed my stomach and told me how he head never loved anyone more than me.
" fine I'll come with you back stage, but I want a signed poster as well as the singed cd for Biba- I mean my sister.
He nodded, a small smile playing on his lips. He took my hand and lead me towards the exit of the signing room while I tried to ignore my stomach flipping. Why was I letting him do this to me again?
" Ashton what are you doing? " shouted a security guard from across the room, "
Ashton ran over and whispered something to him before returning back to me. He pushed open the exit door and we disappeared out of sight of the fans who were giving me the dirtiest looks I had ever seen.

" so?-"I leaned on the wall and slid down it landing on a, used to be white, but now grey carpet.
" I wish you didn't hate me so much"
" I have the right to hate you as much as I do and you know it," I spoke barely above a whisper and my voice was shaky.
" this has been hard on me too you know."
I burst out laughing yet I wanted to cry at the same time."are you serious? You told me you loved me two days before you got on a flight and went across the world for 6 months and didn't even have the courtesy to tell me, or in your case text me, that you were leaving? And then when I spent all the money I had made working at the beach shack to come visit you and surprise you at that bar, I find you with your tongue down some girls throat," I sobbed, " you wouldn't even let me stay in the same hotel room as you! My mum had to fly over to come get me because I had no where to go and we had hardly enough money to get by with, and you made us spend almost all we had on getting me home? She hates you Ashton, my best friend hates you, everyone I know hates you, and more importantly I hate you, " I was shaking with anger.