The Poker Chip Flipping Prison Chaplain

Buck Tells Three Truths and a Lie

After Buck prays in his office, he decides to walk around the prison. The new prison chaplain walks the hallways wondering why the inmates are so joyful. Their raucous laughter, broad smiles, and jubilant fist bumping perplexes him. Their joy irritates him. Why does the inmates' joy irritate him? It should have make him happy. It should bring him joy and relief. If the inmates are happy, Buck's job will be easier. His calling is to lift the spirits of the inmates, to wipe their tears, to give them hope, and to help make prison life as bearable as possible. The way he sees the inmates interacting with each other makes him feel like his job is not necessary.

Mr. Billings tells Buck that the inmates here are happier than the employees. He is right. You can tell by looking at the faces of the inmates and then looking at the faces of the officers. The stark contrast reminds Buck of a day he took Petula, Jeremiah, and Jocelyn to the zoo. Exhausted and ready to leave the zoo, they are trying to figure out where the exit was. Buck figures it out by looking at peoples' faces. The people with sparkles in their eyes and smiles on their faces are the ones who are entering the zoo. They are the ones walking triumphantly as they anticipate a wonderful day. The people with their heads bowed and frowns on their faces are the ones exiting the zoo. They walk slowly and dejectedly. So, Buck and his family follow the people who are frowning and they are led to the exit.

Buck escaped the zoo that day. Now, he finds himself working in a different kind of zoo. He does not understand why the sad countenances of those exiting the zoo matches the attitudes of the workers at the prison, and the joy of those entering the zoo matches the frivolity of the inmates.

Why does the joy of the inmates irritate Buck? It is because he himself is sad. Buck knows he has a nice home to go to after work. He loves his comfortable king-sized bed. He has the freedom to eat anything and anywhere he pleases after work. The feeling of being free does not feel so powerful and good until you are surrounded by people every day who are not free. Buck has a sense of gratitude every evening when he walks out the prison gate. Every morning, when he walks in that gate, he has a sense that the inmates are happier than he is.

After Buck finishes walking the hallways, it is time to go a Department Head meeting where the employees are asked to stand up and state four things about themselves. Three need to be true, and one has to be false. The other employees will guess which one is false. Buck stands up and shares these four things:

I was an extra in the Gray Man, a movie about a serial killer. I played a police detective.

I spent a night in prison sitting next to Jesse Jackson.

I am an excellent dancer.

I once gained access to the Harlem Globetrotters locker room at Kemper Arena in Kansas City by posing as a pizza delivery man.

Nobody could believe all of those things were true about Buck. Which one was false? The Warden says, "It must be the one about Jesse Jackson."

"No, that happened," Buck says.

A young case manager asks, "Who is Jesse Jackson?"

Mr. Billings, Buck's supervisor says, "It is not true that Buck is an excellent dancer."

"That is correct," Buck said.

"How did you know, Mr. Billings?" The Warden asks.

"I have seen the Chaplain walk down the hallways," Mr. Billings says.

Buck could not dance well, and Buck could not sing well. When he served the First United Methodist Church in Hastings, the church services were on cable television. One night, Buck was in the kitchen washing dishes when he heard a terrible noise in the house. Where was the noise coming from? He walked to the edge of the kitchen. The noise was coming from the living room. What was that terrible noise? The living room television was on, and the program playing was one of the First United Methodist Church's worship services. Buck rushed into the living room to see what the irritating sound coming from the living room was. The irritating noise was Buck! At the moment that Buck rushed into the living room to investigate what the terrible noise was, the congregation was singing a hymn. Unfortunately, Buck had left his microphone on.