I'm Sorry For Drunkly Kissing you- Oneshots but mostly DreamNap[DISCONTINUED]

A writer's last chapter

A young writer named Gabriel Cawn, a famous philosophy writer has to write his last chapter of the last book he'd write before his planned suicide, he promised his younger self to do it... to become a stripper in LA, a famous writer, living in a trash apartment, being able to live a good life but not doing it, killing himself the day he hit 30 was the last thing on his list... he did everything his past self wanted, lived with friends, lived alone, been in nice places, stayed at home, did everything he aspired to do.

His last book was named "My last desire"... it was finally done... the chapter named "The End Of Any Suicidal's Story"... the one that was the end of his writing career...

"I want it... i have always wanted it, i have always been so close to it, even before i was born... i have always been so close but so far away from it... it is what i need... what i desire with my entire existence, what i would do anything for... but if i got it i would disappoint people... so i just calmly stay away, thinking about it day and night, wanting it more and more every second, it wont happen soon, i wont get it soon, i need to be away from it to be close to the people i love but it is sometimes so difficult to keep away from something so beautiful, something so loved but so hated, something so magnetic to you, something that just mesmerizes you every second of your life, something so majestic, desired and warm but so dark and feared, it has always been in my thoughts, since i was young, thinking about ways to make it happen, never doing it, knowing that people would miss me stopped me so many times for doing something that i am so in love with, something like a drug, getting me high when i need it.

Do not forget that whatever happens, books will remain in time, your body wont."

That was the end of his book. He wrote it and sent it to the publishing house in a way that makes the book release to the world a few hours before a rose colored bullet went through his skull.

19th of september 2036, his book went out, people read it, it sold out in the first 3 hours, people were already starting to finish it, it was not a long book, only 271 pages long, it was soft, it was not about strong subjects, it was a pleasure to read, some people were sending love, others were concerned about his health but all he knew was that the hotel room is ready and his gun is loaded, he got dressed into a black lingerie under an oversized shirt and a pair of shorts and went into the hotel, when he got there he got his shirt and shorts off as he slowly started to light the candles spread around the room, he looked at the rose petals on the bed before pulling the curtains together, he got up on the edge of the bed, put the gun to his chest and as much as he wanted to pull the trigger, he felt a feeling of numbness as he realised that his friend, Min, would be so hurt by his death... that only Min and another certain person would genuinely care about his death... but he did not even talk to them that much anymore... he did want to die... life meant nothing to him, people that stopped him from ending himself would not talk to him that much anymore, he could die... they would be shocked by the news but would not be surprised, he always said he would die on his birthday, they knew that. He shot at his clothes first, to make sure everything was fine, that the supresor was on, it was, everything was good, he raised his gun to his chest once again and shot. He felt himself gasp as he fell on the black sheets covered with rose petals, it was a nice sight, besides the dead body part.