BAY YANLIŞ

Episode 4 - When plans don't work out...

A wise person once said that life happens when one is busy making plans. Some plans do not work out, some may end up taking a different route. Then there are plans that seem perfect at first but in the end, they offer a deeper understanding of why life worked out exactly the way it was meant to.

Özgür had complete control of his life. Complete. Perfect all the way up to the "T" at the end of the word. In fact, it was so perfect, that he would have scratched his head at just how unbelievably and utterly indescribable his life had turned out because of Ezgi... if he would have been able to do so. But he was not. Because his hands were tied, he was down on the floor, and worst of all he was being held captive with the one woman that irritated him more than anyone else. And it was all because of her...

It all began quite innocently. Özgür decided to take Ezgi away from his family for the evening preceding his sister's traditional henna night before her wedding. It seemed like a good plan. This way, they would not be nagged with inconvenient questions about their relationship. It was a simple plan. It was a great plan. It was a fool-proof plan. And it backfired just as jumping in the water with Ezgi did.

He acted on a whim. He meant it as a joke. A light joke to show Ezgi that she should loosen up and enjoy life a bit more. He wanted to show her there was more to life than rules, guidelines, and lines drawn in sand that one should never cross. So, he turned off his boat not far off the shore and anchored it. Then he swept Ezgi up in his arms and jumped into the water with her. Aaaand... realized he had made a slight miscalculation when it came to the result he wanted to attain.

Rather than loosen up, Ezgi tensed up so much that she couldn't keep from showing it on her face. Why? Because she got scared. Why did that get to him? He hadn't the slightest idea but it did. As Ezgi held onto him, he felt something come undone deep inside. He was used to women taking charge. He was used to women succumbing to his advances. He was used to women seeking those advances in the first place. But Ezgi neither sought his advances not took advantage of the fact that he held her in his arms. She simply held onto him, as if looking for help in their current situation.

So... he let her. And by the time he realized what was happening, it no longer felt innocent and nonchalant. Her hand rested on his shoulder, the other one held onto his side. Her eyes were closed but he could have sworn she felt as open to him as she felt powerless to stop it. And she made him think. For the first time in such a situation in his life, he was forced to think. Normally he would not blink twice about taking full advantage of the fact that he held a woman in his arms. And it wasn't the fact that he wasn't attracted to her. He was. He had established that a while back. But this time, she made him think of the one thing he never thought of before. She made him think of the consequences.

He wanted to kiss her. Any man in his right mind would. They were both adults. Both willing, from the looks of it and from the feel of it. As Ezgi held onto him, Özgür began to draw her in, closer and closer, inch by inch. He held her close. Felt her close. Their lips all but touched. And then...

Özgür froze. Ezgi reacted to his touch exactly the way he assumed she would. But, NO. She reacted the way he YEARNED for her to react. That stopped him dead in his tracks. Never before in his life had he yearned for a woman's touch. He sought it, he welcomed it, but never did he yearn for it. Özgür looked at Ezgi's closed eyes and panicked. Suddenly he felt more open to her than she did to him. What was a man like him supposed to do with that? The only reasonable thing in his mind that was possible. He pushed her away.

Ezgi felt hurt beyond words. Özgür did not push her away physically. He did so in the worst possible way. He pushed away her with his words. He thought he was slick. He thought he was smart. He thought he pointed out how gullible she was to ever think he wanted to kiss her. But the only thing he pointed out was that she was so easily fooled into thinking someone could have been into her. He touched the most vulnerable part of her without realizing what he had done. But she realized in an instant just how vulnerable and helpless she was in protecting herself and her own heart.