SOL (ON HOLD)

CHAPTER 33

I do not know whether ghosts age, or even whether this was what she looked like the last time I saw her, but as I stared into Ceres' eyes and at my lips, there was no doubt about it.

"Hello, Sol, we do not have much time," she said, each word like a hammer to my head, pounding memories out.

"Mother?" I whispered.

"Yes, very nice to meet you," she replied, smiling tightly.

Her honey colored skin glowed in the sunlight, and she was dressed in a simple, but elegant black dress.

"Sol, listen to me carefully, you are in Evamore," she said, stepping forward as I instinctively scrambled back.

Evamore? I thought. The name sounded familiar but when I tried to recall where from, a searing pain ripped through my head.

"Yes, this will be a bit painful as I'm using Evamore's power to contact you-" she began, although I did not hear the rest, because the pain was spreading, across my forehead, down my neck, even to the bridge of my nose.

My vision started to black out at the edges as I desperately tried to focus, although all I wanted to do was lie down and go to sleep.

My eyes flew open as my shoulders shook aggressively. "Sol, did you hear me? You must tell nobody that you saw me. And you cannot trust her, okay? Don't trust-"

The searing pain seemed to split across my skull and I screamed as the world vanished in a flash of white, then a blur of black. I felt my mother release my shoulders. Now I was falling, farther and farther, faster and faster.

I slammed back to reality and stumbled to my knees, blinking rapidly. The headache had faded but an onslaught of memories, thoughts, and emotions crashed over me, sending my sprawling flat onto the grass.

I took a deep breath, closing my eyes as I tried to understand what just happened.

I was in Evamore and I had seen my mother. The image of her dark eyes and even darker braids sent a wave of sadness through me. No, anger? Longing?

I shook the thoughts away as another headache began to creep in and instead tried to remember what she had said.

I'm using Evamore's power to contact you. Yes, but Evamore was meant to be a place of dreams coming true, not malevolent headaches and secret messages.

I groaned as I rolled over to my back. You must tell nobody that you saw me. And you cannot trust her, okay? Don't trust- I massaged my temple as I tried to remember the rest, but all that came to my mind was the memory of the searing headache and blinding light.

"No," I muttered to myself, pressing my hands to my forehead. "No, no, no. Do not tell me that I passed out before hearing what she had to say," I said to no one in particular, as I shook my head.

A thought drifted to me. But you have to remember that it is not real, they are still just dreams. Aleph's words.

Evamore was a place of fantasy and make-believe, so if we truly were in Evamore I had no reason to stress over my mom's words. It was just a dream.

But why I would have dreamt up my mom like that was beyond me and... it didn't feel like a dream.

With my dad, back at Centerfold, I think I knew deep down that it wasn't real, I had just wanted it to be so much that I convinced myself it was.

But here, it was the opposite. I don't want to have dreamed of my mom trying to warn me about some vague, shapeless danger.

Maybe that's the way the real Evamore works, I tried to convince myself, maybe it tries to confuse you into staying.

I was drawn from my thoughts by a dull thud. I spun to see Fyn lying on her back, eyes wide and breathing heavily. I glanced at the others briefly, there were all frozen on the spot, looking eerily statuesque with their eyes closed.

"Fyn, are you okay?" I asked, as I dashed to her side.

She nodded, still breathing deeply. Her cheeks were stained with tears but she looked otherwise unharmed.

"I saw my brothers and sisters again," she puffed.

"How was it?" I rushed out, "What did they say? Did you get any headaches or anything?"

She frowned and shook her head as she sat back up. "No they just- they told me how much they missed me and how glad they were that they could see me again. It was great actually."

My stomach dropped as she didn't mention any blinding lights or wicked pains.

"But I knew it wasn't real, they were too perfect and too shiny and then as I remembered Evamore and I woke up here. It was painless."

I chewed on my cheek, as I glanced at the others, a weight settling at the bottom of my stomach.

Far in the distance I could see gleaming towers and spires that seemed to be made of some glowing pink rock. The cupid's city, I realized as I turned back to Fyn who had already stood up, we really are in Evamore.

"Is it safe to wake the others?" I asked, shaking myself from my daze and glancing warily at the rise and fall of River's chest.

"I don't know but I think we should start with Pelias. He can't really get any worse."

I laughed, and as we shook Pelias' slightly his eyes fluttered open and he stumbled back.

"I guess that's why the field is so large," Ele mused as we all sat, passing round berries, "so no one disturbs their mind slavery."

I laughed hollowly. Everyone was in a sober mood, most of all Aester. I could imagine how I would have felt if I thought I saw Ceres, or my dad again, only to wake up back here.

Even Crow cawed more quietly as Makeda stared between her feet. As I chewed I thought back to my mother's words. You must tell nobody that you saw me. And you cannot trust her, okay? Don't trust-

If it was just a dream then why did that sentence plague me? Why had it settled in my ears and on my mind? Why was it killing me that I didn't hear the name she was about to utter?

If it was just a dream, why did I care?